Escape and Illuminate

The WTF Factor

2011-01-21T10:54:00.000-08:00

Okay, so here's the scene: Sally and Jude are running from the minions of evil Emperor Zeo on his battleship after being caught stealing the Emperor's favorite weapon: THE LASERZAPPER 3000. You're totally invested in this story. YES YOU ARE. Jude is shot in the leg. Sally is carrying him on her back while fending off the evil minions with her laser gun, but she can't run for very much longer. They're both going to die and become minion snacks. Then suddenly, Sally has a brilliant idea. Opening up the nearest garbage shoot, she throws Jude inside and follows suit, slides down the aluminum shaft and is shot out into space, landing on the back of a flying space peacock.

That's right. A FLYING SPACE PEACOCK.

WHAT THE ****!? You've been reading this 2983 page novel for WEEKS and this is

the first time you've EVER heard of a flying space peacock!

I'm not dissing the peacock. I'm sure that, given the circumstances, they could be a very viable mode of transportation in a desperate situation such as Sally's. In fact, the writer (MUAHAHA) soon explains that Sally actually had a magic ring belonging to her great grandmother that, when rubbed, calls for the aid of the peacocks from plant XR2938.

Oh okay, well then, I take back my WTF.

NO. YOU SHOULDN'T.

Unfortunately, I've been running into this problem VERY OFTEN as of late with manuscripts and published books and short stories, mainly those resting in the science fiction or futuristic dystopian genre. Just because it's set in the future doesn't mean I assume food is taken in the form of a capsule, so when mean old stepdad chokes on his food pill and croaks, mark my words, I will again say WTF. Or when sweet Peter, Anna's true love, is dying of a lasergun shot to the chest, and Anna pulls out a heart-healer injector from her back pocket that I've never heard of before and saves her true love, I will say WTF. When Amy and Paul are front runners in an epic car chase that has led into the ocean, but it's okay because futuristics cars can drive underwater, I WILL SAY WHAT THE ****.

Yes, as writers, we have all heard to trust our reader. But trust is definitely different than assumption. Lay out the important concepts like space peacocks and food pills and heart injectors and underwater Mercedes early on in the story, so when your reader finally reaches the scene where that concept becomes the saving (or dying in the case of the mean stepdad) resource, your readers will just go with it!

This message brought to you by a sad little writer whose readers have been stricken with the WTF Factor more times than she's proud of.

ALSO:

Enter Tahereh Mafi's contest and win LOTS OF FREE MONEY.

Adventureland Syndrome

2010-07-18T01:01:00.001-07:00

I formed a post dedicated to probably you

on GotYA.

100 FOLLOWERS!

2010-07-14T21:06:00.001-07:00

No I'm not hosting a contest.

But how did that happen!?!

New Layout

2010-07-02T14:28:00.001-07:00

Hold tight everyone. I may actually start blogging again.

GOTYA Flashback Friday: Movies I Grew Up With

2010-04-22T23:45:00.000-07:00

I've been neglecting my blog, so I have yet to officially announce:

THIS.

It's my new group blog. Know it. Love it. Cherish it.

This week on Flashback Fridays, we're going over movies that we've grown up with.

I consider myself lucky. I grew up during the period of EPICNESS when it came to movies. I'm talking Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe... ALL during my high school years!

Now, I'm a fantasy freak. I was even more of one in high school. You know, when you're hormones are raging, normal fifteen-year-olds go ballistic over that cute football player.

I went ballistic over Hobbits.

I'm surprised I avoided counseling throughout my school career.

There was also the superhero craze: Batman, Spider-man, and that awful Superman remake I never saw.

Have some memorable movies from your high school years? Blog about it and leave a link to your post on GotYA!

SFWC 2010 Release - My Short Story Inside

2010-04-04T00:31:00.000-07:00

Smashwords has just released Building Bridges to Better Tomorrows: San Francisco Writers Conference 2010 Anthology . My short story, "Craven", is featured in the fiction section, and I would be more than honored if you bought the ebook for $5 and told me what you thought!

Music Monday

2010-03-29T16:27:00.000-07:00

New muse for INFINITE NIGHTS as of five seconds ago. Vedera with Satisfy. Enjoy.

Last Blog of the Series: Where Stories Come From

2010-03-25T09:31:00.000-07:00

I got hooked on the fairy takes and Little Golden Books read out loud by my mother and grandmother. I devoured the cartoons and movies pouring out of TV in the late 1950s, the thrilling adventures on the drive-in screens, the lurid comic books and the mind-stretching science fiction of the day. -Christopher Vogler

I wish I would have documented the story process for LUMINOUS, the first book I ever completed and completely revised from start to finish. The journal would have consisted of notes over ten years, from the time I had been obsessing about the new LORD OF THE RINGS movies in Jr. High until now, a few months after I finished the revisions for the second version of the book. Out of every shiny new idea I have ever had, including the two works in progress I'm working on now, this one stuck the most.

Why?

I think it has something to do with the fact that I tried to stick all of the ideas from every inspiring piece of art I absorbed in my teenage years into this one idea. Have you ever gone to an incredible movie and after the show, have an epiphany to make all of your characters more serious, or maybe steam up your romance scene? Have you ever walked out of a really good scifi movie and was like, "I want my book to be just like that"?

Vogler spews a bunch of questions at us in the introduction to A WRITER'S JOURNEY: "Where do stories come from? How do they work? What do they mean? Why do we need them? How can we use them to improve the world?"

Vogler references the book THE HERO WITH A THOUSAND FACES often, and how it applies to many modern movies, including Disney classics and others, such as STAR WARS and CLOSE ENCOUNTERS. There is something about these movies that keeps people going back to them, something in them that people needed. It's our job as writers to find the elements in these fantastical films and convert them into our own art to hold our readers' excitement.

As a fantasy writer, I wholely agree that it's in these movies that hold the key to an audience's attention, and I would be happy "studying" them for the rest of my writing career. So, where did your story come from? Novels? Movies? Have you ever read or watched something that gave you a total epiphany for your current WIP?

Also, if you have yet to check out the other great bloggers and their kick-ass posts on books on writing, please do so. They are all amazing:

Corrine
Kate
Jamie
Laura
Debra
Leila
Jenn

Blog Series: Deepening Your Characters.

2010-03-18T12:24:00.000-07:00

We are all Heroes facing internal guardians, monsters, and helpers. In the quest to explore our own minds we find teachers, guides, demons, gods, mates, servants, scapegoats, masters, seducers, betrayers, and allies, as aspects of our personalities and characters in our dreams. All the villains, tricksters, lovers, friends, and foes of the hero can be found inside ourselves. The psychological task we all face is to integrate these separate parts into one complete, balanced entity.

Talk about serious schizophrenia (also known as what goes on inside my head while I'm at school and at my day job).

As I switched over from Gotham Writers' Workshop's Writing Fiction to Christopher Vogler's The Writer's Journey, I got a little giddy inside. I haven't read parts from this book in a long while, and I forgot how wonderfully Vogler words certain descriptions of characters and events in order to get our mind rolling on what would strengthen a fantasy novel. However, while reading over the chapter on "The Hero", I realized quickly that the chapter doesn't just apply to fantasy novels. It applies to most fiction.

This chapter is so dense, I'll only have room to go over specific key elements in the hero character, or protagonist.

The Hero works as a window to the story, and should be the kind of person that most reading can identify with. No, he's not saying your main character needs to be a seventeen-year-old lovestruck girl and a fifty-year-old male FBI agent all at once, but they do need to reflect both universality as well as originality. Here are the things that help the writer achieve that:

Growth- Your protagonist should be the one that grows the most in the story by overcoming obstacles.

Action- Protagonist should be the most active. Vogler believes that the flaws with most screenplays is when the hero is rescued by some outside force, they become instantly passive. This, he says, is where they need to be most active.

Sacrifice- The willingness to give up something valuable comes second to being tough, brave, or strong.

Dealing With Death- In the center of many stories there's a confrontation with death. If no one dies, then there is a risk of someone dying or "symbolic death in the form of a high-stakes game, love affair, or adventure in which the hero may succeed or fail."
Heroes show us how to deal with death. They may prove it's not so tough, that it can be transcended, etc., but the point of this obstacle is to show that their quest is worthy of risk.

Obviously, these are all of the "universal" qualities of what Vogler thinks are important in a Hero or Protagonist. Do you agree? Do you think he missed anything important?

What do you think are necessary qualities for a protagonist?

Teaser (Sorta)

2010-03-16T10:46:00.000-07:00

I have a new summary for my work in progress under the page INFINITE NIGHTS. Check it out and let me know what you think. I love getting feedback for my plot bunnies.

This one was due to being a hardcore English major. :-P

How Writers Do It: Getting Into the Zone

2010-03-11T09:14:00.000-08:00

Writing a novel is a long haul that can swallow years of a life, a test of endurance for even the hardiest of souls. Nevertheless, for many an aspiring writer, the novel is the great white whale of fiction, and these people will not rest until they have spilled the blood of several hundred pages. Godspeed to them all.

As I sit here waiting for the book I was supposed to be doing this blog series on to come in, I will discuss this topic from Writing Fiction from the Gotham Writers' Workshop. Even though I'm sad that A Writer's Journey by Christopher Vogler hasn't come in yet, I'm kind of glad. There are a lot of great things in this book on the topic of "Getting Into the Zone: What Goes Into the Creative Process of Writing a Novel?".

A quote from Flannery O'Connor that also appears in this book is, "Anyone who has lived to the age of eighteen has enough stories to last a lifetime." This is true. Even during our teenage years we had some sort of grasp on our philosophical beliefs. We has lists of things we loved and hated. Alexander Steele writes the chapter all about finding the "seeds" in this guide to writing fiction. Seeds are what the plant of the story will arise from. There are a million of these inside of us, even at the young age of eighteen, and it is our job to take time to explore ourselves to find a seed that will flourish.

So what does this have to do with getting into the zone? Well, finding a flourishing seed, something that you, the writer, is incredibly passionate about, is the first step. But seeds are cheap... very cheap. Even those who haven't written more than three pages at a time can find hundreds of seeds within them and the world around them. The harder part is "showing up for work". Steele believes that writing isn't a nine to five scheduled kind of deal. Find the time that fits your creative period of the day. Are you feeling the most eager to write when the sun is coming up, or during the graveyard shift?

The next bit of advice that Steele gives is that "it is more important to stick to the schedule you give yourself than it is to write something worderful at these sessions". Wow. The next time you think of saying or thinking, "I'm just not that inspired today", suck it up! Part of getting into the zone is developing a discipline that will be your greatest asset, and eventually, "progress will be made".

Next, find a place where you feel the most comfortable executing your story. Everyone is different. Some writers need solitude while others need Starbucks. Some work better when they have one particular place of writing, like the left end of the couch or the corner of the bed, while others, such as Joyce Carol Oates, claim to have no writing habits what so ever. Find out what works for you and make copious notes of when your put out your best work.

And finally, my favorite part of this section of Writing Fiction: There are two types of writers inside all of us. There is the Free Spirit, "who wears flouncy attire and meditates at ashrams and never stops her kids from crayoning the walls". And then there's Stern Editor, "who wears button-down shirts that peek out exactly one inch from the sleeves of his double-breasted suits". It is important to let Free Spirit reign in the earliest stages of a novel. Fragmentary rambling is definitely key. This allows us to access what is really the meat of our creativity, where we are "both wise and childlike."

Now, it may only be appropriate to "send Free Spirit out for some herbal tea" when the first draft of the novel is complete. It is now Stern Editor's time to shine. Most importantly, "pay attention, because your future readers will be every bit as demanding as he is."

Getting into the zone may require recognition of these two sides of each of us. It may be important to realize we need time for our wild, sporadic side to take control and not be so worried about every little detail of character development or boarding up every single plot hole. And the time for that wild and rebellious side of all of us to disappear is never. "Toward the end of the process, submit yourself to Stern Editor's iron law while Free Spirit is off prancing in a meadow, hopefully conjuring up your next big idea."

Music Monday

2010-03-08T11:06:00.001-08:00

This song is from Brand New's latest cd titled Daisy, and was a real inspiration for one of the most emotional scenes in Prospect's Five.

Enjoy.

Brand New - You Stole

Last night they said the fire had spread
And we said our prayers
And now the flames are burning me in my bed,
But I just don't care
We all go to sleep in the same place
And in the morning hope that we're all the same
Just sit around like broke down cars in the lot waiting for repairs

There you go
There it goes...

Well I wish that I was as good as you
Caring and trusting
And I wish that my condition was new but I'm old and rusting
So we just hurry up only to wait
Add to the list of all the places we hate
And I pretend like I got something to say
But I've got nothing

Now I know that you stole
Yeah you stole
From the cradles they were rocked in
You took the first words that they spoke
Yeah you stole
Yeah you stole
So if I'm a liar and you're a thief
At least we both know where the other one sleeps
So let's end this tonight

Vlog #1 - Girl Crushes

2010-03-06T13:28:00.000-08:00

I apologize for my terribad editing skills.

Here is a small collection of the female protagonists that I am crushing on. Enjoy.

(And I'm totally making a super-hot face in the video still, aren't I? :-P )

Definitely planning on going longer in the future. I just didn't wanna bore ya'll :-)

Books mentioned:

The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
Graceling by Kristin Cashore
Leviathan by Scott Westerfeld

Epic Query Fail: Greatest Hits

2010-03-05T11:10:00.001-08:00

Over at OPWFT, we are taking a big step. The bloggers have been asked to write about their own query/industry faux pas. That's right, we are admitting to our mistakes--our dumb, newbie-esque mistakes that could have probably been avoided if we had done a little research before sending out those shiny letters. But it happens to most, right? Everyone who doesn't know anything about the publishing industry usually thinks that their first draft of their finished manuscript is the shit and every agent/editor is going to want it, no matter how bad the query is.

Err... ok... maybe that was just me. Well at least I'm admitting to it!

Here is a short list of my other query/agent follies:

- Having seven--count them, SEVEN--rhetorical questions in my first query. (Surprisingly, I still got a couple of requests. Don't know how that happened.)

-Getting so nervous when I received my first agent phone call that I actually said "What's up?" when she told me who she was.

-Labelling the first synopsis I ever sent out to an agent as "The Story Killer"

-And, of course, I announced every agent who had my full/partial/who rejected me right on this here blog... and then bitched about it.

Think you can top those? Have an embarrassing query folly of your own? Stop by OPWFT and leave us a comment...

We dare you.

Writers as Artists

2010-03-04T09:56:00.000-08:00

In light of the new blog series I will be participating in, I've been asked to address that statement. Funny thing is, the other day someone asked me if writers were artists during class and I honestly thought they were COMPLETELY joking. But the question was serious. They were looking for my true answer.

I think it is hard for people to consider genre writers to be as true of artists as people who write literary fiction. Maybe it's because genre, no matter what it is, doesn't take itself as seriously as literary fiction, or so we are told. But the thing is, the publishing industry is changing. Agents and editors don't want ANYTHING unless it has a literary edge to it, even if it is category romance or horror or fantasy.

Well that makes sense, right? A literary edge, in my opinion, is something that addresses humanity as a whole--that teaches us something. In all honesty, I don't like reading ANY kind of book that doesn't have this quality. If I can sit through a whole novel and not be able to answer the question, "What did I learn from this?" then I obviously didn't enjoy the book. And no, I don't care if it's a romance novel, YA, fantasy/scifi or even erotica (Err... ok, maybe erotica can pull that one off.) But the point is, every good book, no matter what it's categorized as, no matter what genre, is literary if it teaches us something about ourselves.

This is totally my opinion, by the way, and you're happy to disagree in the comments section of this post. In fact, I encourage you to. :-)

And in other news, the book I will be doing my blog on hasn't come in yet, but will before next week's post. I will be focusing on A WRITER'S JOURNEY by Christopher Vogler, a really interesting read geared towards adventure and fantasy writers. So stay tuned!

Tease of Destructiveness

2010-03-02T10:41:00.000-08:00

I actually haven't teased AT ALL on my latest draft of Luminous, and it's probably going to stay that way. I probably also won't tease any more on the sequel unless there's a part that I really must share.

What I will be teasing a lot from is my YA standalone WIP called Prospect's Five. Seventeen-year-old Aurora has survived suicide. You could say that she's either become reckless or ready to face problems in her second-chance-of-a-life that need to be faced.

--------------

Being the first one to finish a math test always felt great, but if you were in Mr. Ivane’s class and you were a girl, it was the best feeling in the world.

Plastered onto his face was a look of terror as I slapped my test onto his desk with a grin. I was great at math, and he knew it.

“Well, Miss Prodigy, no one else will finish in a while, so I might as well grade it now while I have the chance.”

I drummed my fingers on the desk noisily while he graded. If I did crappy job, then he could easily label me as both a joke and an example. I looked around at the rest of class still taking the exam. Some had stopped with their work to watch. On the second page I got a graph wrong, and he made an extra big minus three as he continued to correct the graph. He never corrected answers on the test. He just wanted me to sweat.

But it was he who got antsy towards the end of my test, not me. The graph was the only thing wrong. He sighed and flipped the test over, marking a thirty-seven out of forty next to my name. I had gotten an A.

“So where are you hiding the cheat sheet, Aurora?” he muttered.

I gritted my teeth and glanced at Theo. He gaped at Ivane, his pencil drooping in his hand. I turned back, watching one busy eyebrow give a gleeful arch.

“So I finish first and get a good score, but, of course, I have to be cheating because I have a vagina,” I said out loud. Too loud. Every single pencil stopped scratching. I could feel several sets of eyes boring into me, screaming, Rory, what the hell are you doing?

“Oh shit,” someone whispered in amusement.

I crossed my arms and glared, waiting for a rebuttal. But I wouldn’t get one, and I knew that. Without breaking eye contact, he tore off a pink sheet from a pad that sat next to his arm. He scribbled something and signed his name, handing it to me. “Have a nice day,” he finally said. I made sure to slam the door on my way out.

The beautiful thing was he wouldn’t get away with this. I would make sure of it.

Blogs Need a New Trend--Music Monday

2010-03-01T23:46:00.001-08:00

I like knowing what others listen to for inspiration when they write. I'm starting something new. Every Monday I'm going to post a track that has inspired a scene, character, or entire novel. I will encourage you to do the same because I love finding new music. :-)

Eisley released an EP a couple of months ago. This band has been inspiration for such a huge chunk of the Luminous series, it's almost ridiculous. I discovered this track last week and cant stop listening to it.

Incarceron, Musing, and Other Things.

2010-02-27T22:09:00.000-08:00

We are chained hand and foot by Protocol, enslaved to a static, empty world where men and women can't read, where the scientific advances of the ages are the preserve of the rich, where artists and poets are doomed to endless repetitions and sterile reworkings of past masterpieces. Nothing is new. New does not exist. Nothing changes, nothing grows, evolves, develops. Time has stopped. Progress is forbidden.

I'm a picky reader.

Lately I've been quite disappointed with the YA literature that I've purchased and read. The characters lacked something... passion, or depth, maybe. INCARCERON changed that. I haven't been this moved since THE HUNGER GAMES.

I don't care if a book is considered "genre". A novel, no matter if it's adult or YA or MG, has to speak for humanity--has to say something about us as a whole. If not, it falls flat for me.

Catherine Fisher did this in INCARCERON. Claudia, the protagonist, was strong, brilliant, and progressive for women as a whole. That is all I will say. I don't want to spoil anything for potential readers.

I have hardly written anything new since the beginning of the year. Whether it be query nausea, like I experienced last summer, fear that I'm not good enough, or simply the chaos of every day life, and haven't taken the time to sit down with my laptop and just write.

Maybe it has to do with the completion of a novel. Maybe that's getting to me--that I've completed so much and just need a break for a while.

But every time I read a novel written by an amazing author, I am put back in my place. There is always room for improvement. There are always sentences that can be enhanced, imagery to be inserted, and characters to be rounded.

Always work to be done.

My products will never be complete. If I am ever published, I know I will only want to tear my book from the shelves and get out a red pen to start putting in things I have only learned through reading, living, and continuing to write, write, write.

And if I take a break, if I never get better, I will never be satisfied.

To SFWC and Beyond--A Personal Journey from a Timid Writer.

2010-02-15T12:40:00.000-08:00

Most of the girls I spend time online with on AW or Twitter know how terrified I was to attend SFWC 2010. When I first registered, I thought it was a great idea. Then again, it was still several months away. I really didn't spend a lot of time actually picturing myself among New York and California agents and editors.

Just so everyone's aware, I have slight social anxiety, the sole reason for my pre-conference jitters.

February approached at lightning speed, and I began freaking out. I didn't have time to write a decent synopsis or think up a pitch that was un-clunkified. My manuscript wasn't as polished as I knew I could make it. I kept picturing myself lost and clueless in San Fran, unable to even find the registration booth at the hotel.

I'm kind of paranoid.

As I soon discovered, the conference wasn't something to be terrified about. Few people come with friends and it was almost every writers first time, which meant that everyone was just as lost and confused as I was. San Fran was beautiful, as well as the Mark Hopkins hotel. I forced myself to feel and be professional around the 300 writers, most of them a lot older than me.

After the first few panels and workshops, I started to realize that, damn, I already knew most of what was being said from the agents, editors, and authors speaking. I'm really not putting myself on a pedestal. Credit for my publishing knowledge goes to the wonderful woman over at AW in the TWFT thread and, of course, the OPWFT thread. I have learned so much invaluable information from them that it put me ahead of the game, which, in a vast sea of aspiring authors, is VERY important.

So my advice to you, my readers, is that if you aren't part of a structured forum or online writers group... DO IT NOW.

I'm also pretty internet savvy. I had created a blog and a twitter account just because my other savvy writer friends had done it and I wanted to be as cool as them (no joke). I learned this weekend that having these things is a total advantage when it comes to building your platform. And also... update, update, update. This, I'm not so good at. It's kind of obvious--I've been blogging only once every three weeks because that's what I have time for.

So it's time to knock that off. ;-)

I will be spending more time on what I learned at the conference over at OPWFT on Wednesday, Feb. 17th. I will be going over a few key tips for aspiring authors with a special focus on YA writers, so be sure to check it out.

Other than that, I met a few fantastic writers at the conference who I will be starting an online writers group with, which is very awesome. I didn't think I would really meet anyone due to my sometimes social awkwardness, so I have no idea how that even happened. But I'm sure as hell glad it did. They are amazing people.

I also learned a lot about what happens AFTER a writer gets an agent, which is something I haven't even bothered to research yet. This insight alone was worth the conference ticket. I learned so much valuable information on an editor's job and what goes on inside publishing houses. I feel that now I am prepared for when I actually do get an agent and I'll know what happens in the next step.

Overall--definitely NOT as scary as I thought it would be. I did lose my cellphone and have a star agent run around the lobby in search of it, which was kind of embarrassing, but I also made it into the SFWC Anthology, which will be available online sometime later this month.

I encourage every writer to attend a conference or workshop. It may not be SFWC. Maybe it's Backspace, PNWA, or SCBWI. Whatever it is, invest your money and go. Trust me. :)

Luminous ThoughtBot 3000 and the Redemption of the Douchebag

2010-01-25T19:15:00.000-08:00

First impressions are a bitch.

It's easy to make characters untrustworthy in the beginning of a stand alone. It's even easy to keep them that way for the entire first book of a series. In fact, I LOVE doing this because I know that eventually, my naughty characters will be redeemed.

But my readers don't.

My bad boys came easily for me in LUMINOUS. Well, Shae just enjoyed being a douche. For those who don't know, his introductory chapter starts off with him being drunk and his hands up a girl's shirt. Silly Shae. Easily forgivable, possibly redeemable.

Sure, Shae is easily redeemed because half of LUMINOUS is in his point of view. Inner thoughts are the gateway to his humor, fears, and even some insightfulness. Without the mysteriousness, he becomes the goofy jock we all knew from high school with a little more loveability.

But what about Adrian? He's my boy with a real dark side. Are first conniving, traitorous impressions of him going to haunt readers if LUMINOUS ever turns into a series? Is his redemption, if he ends up having one, going to be believable? Or is he always going to come off as untrustworthy?

I know that, for those of you who haven't read LUMINOUS, this just sounds like a bunch of garbage. But don't think I'm not going to supply a little bad boy backup to get you wondering about Adrian De'Laine as well. Hero? Villain? Neither?

How about your opinions? I mean, I know they're all different. Maybe your fictional fantasies weren't as far as wondering if James was going to show up at Bella's door with a bundle of flowers and an "I'm Sorry" card, but we are all aware of the bazillions of Draco/Hermione fangirls out there that hoped for some bad boy redemption.

So tell me, how solid are first impressions? Can they be changed in YA lit? If not, what prevents them from being changed?

And since it's Teaser Tuesday, I leave you with a snippet of REVERENCE, the sequel to LUMINOUS (because I can't freaking stop working on it). The scene features my favorite bad boy through the point of view of his brother, Elijah.

----------------------------

He was screwing everything up.

I couldn’t juggle this. Not now. Not on top of Jordan. She consumed all of my energy as I spent every waking minute watching her eyes.

Eyes.

The things they lit up on—Oh, how I could tell when she was slipping too far. She devoured the cabin’s books, eyes hungry for more. More knowledge. More information. More fuel. And the way her eyes were when she controlled me. When I let her.

Amused.

She enjoyed it too much, and I knew I had to stop her eventually. Not stop, but attempt to. Talk at least, if I could bear it. But I couldn’t talk, not when all of my worry was devoted to Adrian.

We were alone. He knew I was about to lose it. I could see it in his stance—back pressed against the wall, hands clasped behind. Staring with his head tilted downward, gleefully awaiting my attack.

“You.” My voice wavered. I could feel the puddle of words boiling at the back of my throat. “You are destroying everything, and you know it.”

He cocked his head. “No. No I don’t.”

He was egging me on.

I ran my fingers through my hair and pulled, hoping the pain would clear my head. The floor squeaked with every pace I took. “You’re giving her what she wants. Everything we learned in the Academy is making its way from your mouth right into her ears.” I spun, pointing at his chest. “You can filter it and you’re not, so don’t tell me you don’t know!”

Bang. His fist collided with the headboard next to him. “I’m not a fucking saint, Elijah!” He stepped forward, pointing to the door. “And neither is she. Stop trying to protect her.”

I mirrored his step, afraid. I was afraid of him. Always had been. But his logic was gone, and it wasn’t fair. Not for Jordan. Not for me. “I’m protecting her because you failed at your Academy scheme.”

He scoffed and shook his head. “Scheme?”

“You underestimated her.”

He rolled his eyes. “Oh, please.” His tone transformed from rage to boredom. Boredom. “Stop pretending you can fight them.”

“Whose side are you on?” I cried.

“No one’s,” he said. Defiant. Bold. Not an ounce of hesitation.

His response wasn’t a surprise. That didn’t stop it from feeling like a twisted knife in my stomach. I fell against the wall, breathing in through my nose.

A bed separated us. He leaned on it, his malevolent eyes not breaking from mine. A smile played at his lips. “You know what happens when bastards like me know they deserve to die?”

Teaser Tuesday, Sort of but Not Really

2010-01-05T11:30:00.000-08:00

I think it's important for us as writers to let the world know how we get stuff done, don't you? I mean, I can't tell you how many people are in straight up awe over the fact that I finished the first draft of a 78k word novel in two months. To most, even the ability to write more than 20 pages in a month is God-like.
In all honesty though, when you have the right inspiration (besides being infatuated with your characters, of course), things just happen. Words just come out.
End of story.
So here I am, ready to bring you, my readers, into a very short teaser of my life through pics of my last write-a-thon of 2009, the one that I hope will open doors this month and next to what I think will be a wonderful novel.
Closing write-a-thon for LUMINOUS with typing pal Leah :

This is me at 8:30 am, and you should be proud. College kids don't get up at 8:30am when they're on winter break unless they have to work.

This is my epic board of stickies, a place for plot holes and notes for character development to sit until I put them to rest. It's filled up since the time this picture was taken, unfortunately.

Sarah needs a second bookshelf, me thinks. Poor bookshelf.

This is actually Leah's fierce, "I'm going to kill you for making me get up at nine", look. Yes, folks. It's love right there.
Leah and I have this weird like for writing on my bed since we no longer live together and have our awesome futon of imagination. Still works though. Just means I get to sit in bed all day. :-) Hey, at least I'm being productive.

We make about three of these stops during the day. This is our first one. When we get back home, the writing ensues. Well, more like writing, youtube break, food, writing, coffee, writing, writing, distraction from failblog or icanhascheezburger, writing, AW FNW, writing, food, coffee, AW FNW. You know. The usual.

Is she writing or surfing the web. See? I can't tell. I'm being a good girl though. :D

This is my happy I-just-finished-the-climax-of-my-novel face. Yes, I was in bed when I did it. Coincidence? I think not.

There you have it. I dominated about 8k words. Days like these are the reason why I could finish my novel in two months. And yes, I would rather be doing this on my day off than practically anything else.

So, how do you get your huge chunks of writing out of the way. Where do you sit? Are you alone? Have any comfort foods? How much caffeine do you consume?

Tell me. :-)

HEY! My contest at OPWFT ends in ten hours!

2009-12-21T10:54:00.000-08:00

My coffee contest at OPWFT ends tonight! All you have to do is blog about what book or movie inspired your WIP to win $35 worth of Starbucks products and Tamora Pierce's WILD MAGIC! Details are here.

ENTER ENTER ENTER!!!

Official Announcement: Website Up!

2009-12-10T21:38:00.000-08:00

I officially published my website!

HERE

Check it out and tell me what you think!

Can any of us escape GENRE?

2009-12-06T22:11:00.000-08:00

I hate being barricaded by genre.

Genre this, genre that. Everything has to fit into some sort of category, or else the agents and editors will have no idea how to market your book. We have all heard this before. As writers, we live by it, wanting to market our material so badly that we cram our well thought out piece into a slot familiar by all.

There are a lot of writers, good and bad, who start out writing genre fiction. This isn't necessarily a terrible thing, but there is an underlying tone to the phrase. One of the reasons college professors won't let you workshop genre stories in a creative writing class is because for new writers, instead of focusing on characters, you become more obsessed with your plot--your undying romance, your sick gun fight in your western, your magic rocks that have time traveling powers. You get the picture.

Well, I am a new writer, and every time I type "LUMINOUS, my YA Urban Fantasy" in a post or query letter or whatever, I mentally cringe. I think of all of the people reading it, professional or not, who immediately group me into the category of fresh writers, their stories based off of fae lore, vampire romances, wizards, time travellers etc.

Again, this isn't a bad thing, but this also isn't what I write. I do use fantastical races to open my world up to possibility--allowing me to use the tool of "ultimate power" to explain what would happen if the wrong people possessed it, and a flawed hero who does possess it but doesn't think she can handle it. I later incorporate it into politics, morality, and relationships, desiring to invoke a deeper feeling in the reader than simply the feeling of amazement and adventure.

Desiring to say a little something about the world we live in--about society.

Even with all of this being said, I can't market my book as YA literary fiction with fantasy elements. It's hard to say if I would ever get a request.

Probably not.

So authors--has the word genre ever worn you down? Do you ever feel barricaded by a category that you feel doesn't do your story justice? Tell me.

Post-NaNo Geek Out and the Question Box

2009-12-02T16:29:00.000-08:00

It is done. 50k words in a LUMINOUS rewrite that seems to be loving me more and more every single day. My characters are becoming so beautifully rounded and unique, their voices separate from one another in ways that I have only dreamed about.

Yes, cheesy, I know--but so true.

I have really been blessed with inspiration for this draft. Now that I have hit the 2/3 mark, I am ready to wrap it up and edit the crap out of it before my conference in February. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I am so ready for this. I am ready to share my ideas with readers--my fantastical world wrapped around obstacles of ethics and morality that my main characters have to overcome.

I feel like I've learned a lot through them, and most of their story isn't even typed out yet. It doesn't seem to matter--just breaking open the Pandora's Box of LUMINOUS rhetorical questions has taught me a lot about myself, and what I would hope to do in my characters' situations.

What if you were born on the villainous side of a war, and knew it?
How would you justify taking the life of someone you hardly knew to save your own?
Would you be able to forgive a deceitful person who changed their mind about initiating a massacre involving you and the ones close to you only hours before it was supposed to happen?

Are you writing? Tell me--what's in your question box?

NaNo Update

2009-11-16T16:25:00.000-08:00

Yes, I haven't blogged forever. Yes, I'm sorry.

For those of you who don't know, I have decided to rewrite THE ILLUMINATED for NaNo, whose name I changed to LUMINOUS (The whole one word thing fit better with the titles of the next four)

Why, you ask?

I realized the reason why I was getting a lot of rejections on query letters was because it was seriously, SERIOUSLY impossible to write a good letter for that book... setting up racial concepts that I made up while trying to make the plot sound interesting just wasn't working.

With this new approach, I'm cutting to the chase sooner and focusing a lot more on politics and ethics.

Anywho, a little behind on NaNo. Hope I can get 50k by the end of the month.

New OPWFT Post

2009-10-20T10:46:00.001-07:00

Check it out here!

Follow us and leave a comment! You know you wanna...

Who Knew Autumn Stood for Contests?

2009-10-14T13:41:00.000-07:00

Holy crap. All of the literary contests coming up are making me both go crazy and squeal in happiness. Writers, are you taking advantage of this? If not, then get on it!

Here's a short list, to name a few:

NaNoWriMo

Nathan Bransford's First Paragraph Contest

Delacorte Press First YA Novel Contest

SFWC Writing Contest

Haven't done one of these in a while-- TEASER TUESDAY!

2009-10-06T13:06:00.000-07:00

I'll be taking a break from The Illuminated series to embark on my NaNoWriMo adventure. I'm really excited about this book. It's edgy and very different from my usual novel-length ideas. I'm trying to book out 30k in October and 50k for the contest in November.

The WIP title is currently PROSPECT'S FIVE. Five teenagers wake up from their suicide attempts with their wounds healed and find each other via a forum. They bond, and when one of the five hacks into a school blog and discovers that a group of students are planning a school shooting, they band together to stop it, and discover that they do have a purpose--saving the lives of countless innocent students.

Here's my first page. Tell me what you think!

It wasn’t until the salty, metallic tasting water hit the back of my throat did I realize—to my dismay—that I was still alive.

Pain exploded in the pit of my stomach. My hands slid against the slick rim of the tub as I pulled myself up, heavily diluted blood spewing from my mouth. I threw myself over the porcelain before hurling stomach acid and thirty sleeping pills onto the bathroom floor.

This couldn’t be happening.

I quickly snatched a towel from the rack and buried my face, shrieking into the terrycloth. The agony was blinding, my arms searing with the deeps cuts as my body rebuked the drugs. As my head swam, I prayed that I would pass out and sink beneath the water. Anything to take me away from this.

The water. I pulled my face away from the towel to see the damage. It was thick with crimson, running in tiny streams down my torso and into the larger body. It was so dark—I didn’t understand how I was still conscious.

The dizziness was nearly overwhelming when I pulled my wrists from beneath the murky surface. In place of the deep, crisscrossing wounds that I had inflicted upon myself less than an hour ago were light pink scars—like an apparition of the damage I knew I had done. I ran my fingers over the marks on my right arm—they weren’t even raised. My skin felt like silk.

NaNoWriMo Anyone?

2009-10-02T20:36:00.000-07:00

So my lack of money has caused me to postpone the video blog.

But I will prevail with the idea, no doubt! Just maybe not yet :-)

Question to all blog followers and anyone else who may be reading. Anyone registered for NaNoWriMo this year? If so, please link your profiles. I want a writing buddy!

I came up with a fantabulous idea last week and want to crank it out before the conference, so this seems like a great opportunity!

Here's my profile http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/user/513273

A Tantalizing Idea

2009-09-26T22:47:00.001-07:00

I've decided to make myself famous.

Not really, but I was wondering how well I would be able to pull of a video weblog about writing. I would have to ham myself up, of course, but a two minute video would be easier to watch than reading a five paragraph blog. You can also make fun of my face while your at it.

Look at me. Here I am convincing writers not to read. Wow, I fail.

But anyways, interesting idea? If I started it up, would you guys watch?

That is all. Have a greeeeaaat night.

P.S. - Website almost up! It's looking pretty rockin'.

ONWARD! (In a more schizophrenic kind of way)

2009-09-13T19:19:00.000-07:00

Writing THE ILLUMINATED was an interesting experience. A lot of it consisted of stomping out vital scenes in order to make everything interconnect. I had this huge idea for a world looming in the back of my head... HUGE. I needed to figure out factions and blood-pride and abilities, and who possessed what and why in order for the details to fit into the larger picture. Once that was all done and I actually HAD my plot, I could go back and bring my creations to life-- Make Jordan more modest, Ryan bubblier, Shae more suave, Elliot bitchier, Elijah sweeter, and Adrian more dangerous.

And then something strange began to happen. My characters started making their own damn decisions.

I'm on chapter five of REVERENCE, the sequel to THE ILLUMINATED, and it's like nothing I have ever experienced before. Every session at the keyboard is like watching a movie for the first time. I have no idea what the hell is going to happen. My sextet's personalities are slightly unstoppable, and now that I've created, there's no turning back.

So now, in the famous and slightly tweaked words of Doctor Frankenstein, I can now scream "THEY'RE ALIVE!"

Just today I was sitting at my computer typing away, writing in the point of view of Elijah. Then he took over, making me type things that I wasn't expecting to, drawing a separate destiny path that was different from what I had planned for him. I found myself saying. "Really, Elijah, Really?" Of course, my question was answered with a beautiful plot epiphany.

So much for story outlines.

And so much for "you'll probably end up trunking your first novel." I'm truly afraid of what my characters will do to me if I ever make the decision to not continue on with their stories and not to make them known--especially some of the scarier ones I've created. They'll probably jump off of the page and torture me into submission.

So onward ho, my brave Illuminites! Your story will not end here!

Beta Anyone?

2009-09-11T16:14:00.001-07:00

So it's been totally hard for me to keep this up because everything this month is screaming at me not to continue querying.Every agent that has a full doesn't even get thirty pages into it before they put it down, my first page is incredibly un-hooky, etc. I still really don't have any solid opinions on this book yet from anyone except for a few friends.

So anyone care to beta?

I would appreciate it. Email me if you're interested at epiphany(at)sti(dot)net.

In other news, I was totally disappointed in Saosin's new release, In Search of Solid Ground, but there is one song titled Deep Down which totally threw me for a loop when I was listening to it while driving today. Not like this will mean anything to anyone but me, it's a total Elijah/Jordan song for my planned third book titled TEMPEST. Lyrics and all. Check it out.

A Big Wishing Well Donation

2009-08-31T21:46:00.001-07:00

*deep breath*

Ijustregisteredforawritersconference!

San Francisco Writers Conference 2010, here I come.

Good God, I am so nervous already. I'll be there by myself, wandering sheepishly through a sea of important people and people who know what they're doing.

Anyone have any advice for me?

Teasaaaaaa!

2009-08-25T13:38:00.000-07:00

Rewrite from last night. Enjoy!

The Illuminated -- Jordan's POV

I sat up. “I saw some sort of light floating through the sky, and men attacking Elliot, but I don’t know how the two connect.” I pushed back my hair. “Were they Egnotis?”

He rubbed his eyes. “No, not Egnotis. They were their creations.”

I shook my head. That didn’t make sense. I saw them—they looked like live, buff, healthy men to me. How could the Egnotis create them?

He held out his hands. “The reason why I wanted to tell you this, Jordan, is because you’ve already heard enough terrible things about my people—about who I am. I just—I need to make sure you know that I’m not like them. I would never do something like this to someone.”

I had no idea where he was going with this. “Do what to someone? Elijah, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

He bit his lip, staring at me with the most guilty expression I had ever seen in my life. “The Egnotis can lure someone into giving up their soul. They die, and—and—”

He must have paused due to the look on my face. I held out my hand, not wanting to hear the rest, not knowing if I could handle it.

“Jordan.”

“Just hold on.” My insides lurched. “Wait.” I was up in an instant, tripping over my feet and throwing open the bathroom door. My knees hit the stone ground, and I heaved the contents of my stomach into the toilet.

It wasn’t because of what Elijah had just told me. It was from everything. From Homecoming. From being taken away from my parents. From watching Shae and Ryan writhe in pain. From learning what it was that Elliot had beheaded. It was long awaited.

A Look At Castle Hill and Presque Isle, Maine

2009-08-22T12:59:00.000-07:00

I have yet to do this on the blog. I thought it would be kind of neat to post a few pictures of the setting of THE ILLUMINATED. One day I hope to be able to visit!

Presque Isle, Maine

Presque Isle High, Jordan's, Shae's, and Ryan's school

Castle Hill, Maine--Where there homes are and the woods surrounding Eldridge Estate

Aerial view of Castle Hill-- I totally picture the De'Laine and Adeline houses to be next to each other like those two buildings.

Castle Hill in the summer

Aroostook Mall, home of one of my favorite scenes involving exploding flourescents and hiding under clothing racks.

These are what I could find on the net. Maybe one day I'll be able to see for myself. One could only hope.

Zombie Tuesday... I Mean Teaser... Teaser Tuesday

2009-08-18T21:50:00.000-07:00

In light of my new undead-esque query and the awesome new Zombieland trailer, I bring you a sweet little soulless teaser.

THE ILLUMINATED -- Ryan's POV

Adrian did not look at Elliot before his descent. She followed.

The rain pelted against their hoods. Elliot raised her head slowly, her expression solemn—determined.

It began.

The mud began to move, lumps growing in size. Hands reached from the grime, the thickness sloshing. The wolves growled and Elliot held them back. Adrian grabbed onto her arm. He pulled her close and whispered something in her ear. The shapes took full form, mud dripping from them. Some were men—others women. They crouched, many holding knives. Staring. Waiting.

Seventy of them—at least. I covered my mouth to muffle my moan of terror.

Elliot looked at Adrian. She nodded. Together, they turned to face them. Together, they marched.

Query Adventure - A.K.A Possible MASSIVE failure

2009-08-17T22:08:00.001-07:00

August 16th, 11:00pm - I come home from work, lugging all of my snail mail supplies up to my room. Yeah it's late, but I gave myself a whole month to work on my submission material, promising myself I would begin a new querying process on the 17th. Nineteen snail mail queries in all, a beautiful prime number. I begin the process of letter signing and label sticking on my bed.

Yeah that's right--labels. I'm legit, trying to hide from agents the fact that I'm a broke-ass twenty-year-old still living with my rents. These are definitely the best looking queries I've ever sent out, and this letter survived a decent percentage of QLH. People still had things to say about it even after the third edit, but eventually it got to the point where I didn't like the new suggestions at all, so I had to take a step back, form the letter in the direction I liked the most, and print it.

August 17th, 10:00am - Wake up time. Yeah it's late, but I start school next week so I'm trying to soak up as much sleep as possible, especially with 6:30am mornings in my near future. Toast with homemade pear jam, kombucha tea, and a new OPWFT blog post by Annie are waiting for me.

10:30am - Back to work. Slight epiphany on the synopsis, and I do a bit of cutting and tweaking until I like it. I print out six for specific envelopes along with several samples of work that certain agents ask for.

12:00pm - Dad comes home for lunch and wants to eat stir fry with me. I decide that the post office can wait. He brings home good news--the granules they found in his lungs are benign. (Thank Jesus)

1:00pm - One last look at everything before I seal the last of the envelopes.

1:30pm - I need to pick up my tips from the Bux. I get a free drink from the shift on duty. I love my iced soy caramel macchiatos, especially when people make them for me and I don't have to make them myself.

2:00pm - I drop off my #10 envelopes in the box outside the post office with a pang. After a few months of querying I've developed this horrible moment of self doubt every time I drop something down that little blue chute. What if this letter sucks? What if I just wasted a load of my time and money? I grit my teeth and push open the post office door, where a line 3 light years long awaits me, filled with all of Oakhurst's 70+ year old citizens. They greet me with a stare. The manila envelopes shift awkwardly in my hands.
I recognize all of the employee's faces. I'm in here too often. Adrian is working today, and I fail at suppressing my smile. Adrian helped me when Leah and I went to the post office the morning I shipped off my partial to Baker's Mark. We gabbed over his name the second we were out of the office, hoping the fact that the hands I entrusted my package with happening to have the same name as one of my characters was a sign of good luck.
When the man that calls "Next in line" to me isn't Adrian, I'm slightly disappointed. But it's okay, because the man who helps me is nice. Maybe it's because I'm polite to him--or maybe it's because I'm the only young person he's seen all day.

2:15pm - It's a nervous relief to have those envelopes off of my hands. I can only pray now. Pray and wait. And edit. I know that manuscripts are supposed to be polished before querying, but I'm a compulsive editor and tweaker (not like the drug addict). I'm going to be one of those people wanting to pull their book off of the Border's shelf to take a red pen to it.
I listen and sing to Eisley on my way home, my summer ILLUMINATED muse.

2:30pm - I sit on the couch with my laptop, one because it's comfy, and two because my room is too messy to concentrate in. I need to work on that. I send out nine EQueries, hating the way the unprofessional formatting looks. I wonder how many of these agents will bother to reply to me.

3:30pm - My work here is done. I remind myself that patience is a virtue, and hope for good news in the next month. My characters are tired being stuck in the bland white abyss of their Microsoft Word template. Jesse comes over. We end the day with a trip to the movies to see District 9, and a rental of From Within that we watch on my couch. Two movies in a few hours. What a couple of dorks. But it's okay, because both were fantastic.

So tell me, what is your query journey like? Is it like mine, or completely different? How do you feel when mailing out your letters? Are you frightened---excited? Can you simply not wait for this part of your journey to be done and over with?

Female Characters: Gender Bending

2009-08-13T14:55:00.000-07:00

I like to bend rules.

I secretly enjoy taboo things. While others are usually turned off, I am undoubtedly fascinated. Do I write taboo? I have had subtle sexual tension between brother and sister in a short story before, yes, but no, I don't usually go all out.

What I do with my writing is less of what people would consider taboo and more of what I would consider rule bending. My main focus of rule bending in THE ILLUMINATED are the three females--Jordan, Ryan, and Elliot.

No, you did hear me correctly. I did say females. And this is where the gender adventure begins--my name choices for my three lovely leading ladies. I didn't name them this way to confuse my readers. I have a couple of reasons why these girls have masculine names, involving symbolism and plot.

Let's talk about plot first, because that's the easy one. Ryan's parents, Jordan's parents, and Elliot's parents were all friends and wanted to name their children after the three brave founders of the Variean stronghold. The next children they bore happened to be all girls. Go figure.

So like I said, the plot part was easy. Symbolism is slightly trickier, but I'm sure that if you are reading this, you've already guessed by now. The answer lies in one key word. Feminism.

I know it sounds silly and oversensitive, but even names separate us. My vision for my six main characters (you can get to their profiles through the side bar --------->) is to make them as equal as possible--a perfect functioning unit together. The boy names are a symbol for this unity, an equality through names. What's funny is that even two of the boy names are unigender (Shae and Adrian).

I could not bring myself to have any female characters a walking advertisement for America's perfect woman. Any feminine trait had to be leveled out with a masculine "flaw" (or gift as I would put it. I love tomboys)

Jordan was the easiest. She doesn't try to doll herself in any way. Short hair, no makeup, and comfortable clothing is the way to go for her. However, she still appears delicate, and is an intellect more than a fighter. This could be seen as her feminine trait. She is never a damsel in distress though. I hope none of my characters ever are portrayed like that *shudders*.

Ryan is the polar opposite. She loves dolling herself up and enjoys kicking ass. She's physically elite, and would laugh if any boy even challenged her to a physical contest.

Elliot is my fullblown tomboy. Everything screams masculine, except for her beautiful, thick, long hair. But even that she never brushes.

So why did I go to this kind of extreme with every single one of my main girl characters? I guess I am trying to make up for all of the books I read where the girl needed saving, all of the Bellas that needed rescuing by her Jacobs and Edwards. I loved the books, but after a while I realized that they were just emphasizing what every other novel was telling me about my gender. The strength was missing. I wanted to be inspired by strong girls. So I created a few, a few that were strong without being Laura Croft slutty. A few that hopefully one day girl readers can look up to and want to be more like, instead of fitting into the cookie cutter image of the perfect feminine female, or even worse, wanting to be just like little miss pole dancing Miley Cyrus.

Character Profile - Shae Adeline

2009-08-07T22:47:00.000-07:00

I rolled my eyes, and Ryan broke out into another fit of silent laughter. “No one hates you, Jordan,” I assured her. “I already told you, it’s not a big deal. You don’t have to feel bad… you don’t even have to feel sorry. I don’t care.” I thought for a moment. “You can be jealous of me though.” It was only after I showed her the same light bulb trick that I taught Ryan did she break down.
I felt her body shake with laughter. She pulled away from me and caught sight of the two girls that sat on the love seat. I watched her cheeks instantly flush with embarrassment. She quickly wiped her eyes. I took hold of her face and made her look at me.
“It’s not a big deal. You don’t ever have to change. I can just protect you while you’re a weak little girl.”

Actor Choice - Jesse James

Race - Hybrid

Gender - Male

Age - 16

Height - 6'2"

Weight - 190

Eyes - Brown

Clothes- Comfortable and casual, but slightly classy. If not in his soccer jersey or workout clothes, usually something American Eagle-esque

Appearance - Tall and stocky. Tanner than his sister. Square jaw, wider bridged nose, and shaggy, sandy hair.

Family Ties - Brother of Jordan. Son of Lucy and Kevan.

Relations With The Five Other Main Characters -

Elliot: Likes her, but all-in-all is wary of the whole kicking ass, uber feminist, destroyer aspect of her.

Elijah: Well, first he kidnaps his sister, and then won't leave his sister's hip. Annoying much? Shae thinks so.

Shae: Ryan's spontaneous, but Shae knows that he'll listen to anything she says. They're a team.

Adrian: Respects Adrian. Wants to be like Adrian when it comes to Egnotis aspects. But is a bit afraid of Adrian (of course, he would never admit that)

Jordan: Best sister ever! If you minus all of the annoying "I don't know why everyone likes me, I'm just a dumb girl" lines and needing to protect her when she refuses to transform. But he still adores her.

Favorite Book - Okay, so one time this really hot chick told him to read Twilight by Stephenie Meyer, and it totally was stupid. Totally a girl book. He totally hated it, even though he has a hard bound copy hiding behind his Michael Crichton books at home. And he's totally hotter than Edward.

Favorite Subject in School - Math

Love Interest - Every girl at Presque Isle High with a cute personality. That's how he rolls.

Secretly/Not So Secretly Loves - Running really fast for a very long time.

Secretly/ Not So Secretly Hates - When any member of his family or friends are in danger

Obvious Personality Trait - Lovable, Witty

Theme Song - On My Own - The Used

Mmm... Teasing...

2009-08-04T00:20:00.000-07:00

Revamped Party Scene from THE ILLUMINATED

Chapter Seven, Jordan's POV

--------------------------------------------

“The Queen has arrived!”

Oh, God.

“Hey,” I replied meekly. I didn’t recognize the tiny blonde who proclaimed my appearance.

Addy moved away from the group and down the steps, running across the gravel and stumbling onto me. She giggled profusely.

“Where did you go after the ceremony? I was looking for you eevveerywhere!”

“I hid,” I grunted as she squeezed me tightly.

“You hid? Why did you hide?” I struggled to hold her upright. Her eyes widened and she bit her lip. “Your brother is a great kisser.”

I made a gagging noise. “Eww.” We walked towards the house. “Why would you tell me that?”

“Because I’m kiiiinnnd of drunk.”

“I’m guessing that Shae completely forgot about making sure that I arrived before ten.” Great. I probably could have just stayed home.

Addy shrugged. “I don’t know. He’s inside, and I want to find him again.”

My nose crinkled in disgust. “I’m sure you do.” Our conversation was cut off from the cheers that emitted from the living room when we entered. I looked up.

There must have been over 70 teenagers crammed inside the house. People were crying my name. I gave a horrified grin and clutched onto Addy’s arm.

“Find my brother. Find my brother now.”

“Okay!” Addy squealed. Before long I was following her drunken ass as she stumbled through the crowd.

Hands were reaching out to me. Girls were stopping me to give hugs. “I have to find Shae!” I kept crying out. If Addy didn’t find him soon, I was going to spontaneously combust.

I spotted my brother before she did. He towered over most around him, holding a bottle. His eyes brightened when he saw me. “Is it ten already?”

I grabbed the bottle from his hand. “You drove here. You need to sober up.”

He shrugged. “You’re probably right. Hey!” Addy bounded towards him, wrapping her arms around his neck. He grabbed her waist greedily and pulled her close, planting his lips on hers. I threw my free hand in the air and walked away.

The kitchen was just as crowded as the living room, the counters covered in spilt beer. I emptied out Shae’s bottle into the sink. I turned around to find a trash can, meeting Josh’s narrow eyes.

“Hey, I thought I told you to come say hi when you got here.” His grin was mischievous.

I put my hand on my hip and set the bottle on the counter. “Yeah, and I got here all of thirty seconds ago. Kind of hard to find anyone when there’s a zillion people inside your house.”

His hands were on my waist, and my heart leapt into my throat. “You looked gorgeous tonight.” His face was too close.

Tile pressed into the small of my back as I strained to get away. “What are you doing?”

He moved both of his hands up to my jaw. A rock song blared through the room, but I heard him perfectly over the mayhem that engulfed the house. “Oh come on, baby. I thought we hit it off in the car.”

My anger swelled. “I thought you were being nice.”

He pressed his forehead against mine, his grin widening. “I was being nice.”

My hand was up, pushing against his chest. “Back off, Josh.”

His grip tightened on my jaw, and he pressed his body against me. “Jordan, don’t be like that.”

“I said. Back. Off.”

Character Profile - Ryan Roje

2009-08-01T18:49:00.000-07:00

“Don’tyoudare!” Ryan shrieked. She stomped towards me and threw herself on the ground, chucking each piece of makeup one by one into the wastebasket under my desk.
“Hey! That’s the only stuff I own!”
She pulled a hefty nylon zipper bag out of her purse. “And you should be ashamed of yourself. The party is after the game, Jordan. You don’t get to go to the ceremony dressed up as a clown.” She motioned to my bed. “Sit.”

Actor Choice - Molly Quinn

Race - Hybrid

Gender - Female

Age - 16

Height - 5'6"

Weight - 135

Eyes - Green

Clothes- Forever 21. 'Nough said.

Appearance - Long, pin straight red hair. Irish complexion. Well built due to Taekwondo

Family Ties - Sister of Zacharius and Alaura. Daughter or Nelson and Iris.

Relations With The Five Other Main Characters -

Elliot: Ryan Adores her. Thinks she's the coolest thing existing since the dawn of Easy Cheese. Wants to be exactly like her... except maybe a more bubbly, nicer, animated version.

Elijah: Doesn't stop gabbing on how incredibly sexy she thinks he is. A lesser relationship though, considering Elijah spends most of his time with Jordan.

Shae: BFFs since before either of them could walk. Inseparable and a dynamic duo. They consult with each other before making any type of decision.

Adrian: Another De'Laine brother that she doesn't hide showing her attraction to. Has a closer bond with than Elijah, evolving from a specific incident with his BMW and dragging him up a hill in the pouring rain.

Jordan: More like a sister than a friend. Ryan helps girlify and calm Jordan with her ecstatic personality.

Favorite Book - The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins

Favorite Subject in School - P.E. - Because she simply adores kicking all of the boys asses at every game and sport.

Love Interest - Ryan easily crushes, but nothing solid yet.

Secretly/Not So Secretly Loves - Taekwondo and department store makeup

Secretly/ Not So Secretly Hates - Slutty girls

Obvious Personality Trait - Energetic, bubbly, optimistic

Theme Song - XOXOXO - Secret and Whisper

Character Profile - Adrian De'Laine

2009-07-29T23:51:00.000-07:00

He suppressed a smile and shook his head. “Your curiosity amuses me.”
I felt a change inside of me, something that made me giddy and light. Adrian was working his virtues, and I was sure he didn’t even realize that he was doing it. There was a tugging at my core—I took a step towards him, our eyes locking. It wasn’t until he raised an eyebrow that I blushed and looked away. “Man, you’re dangerous.”
“Dangerous?”

Actor Choice- Don't laugh. This part was unintentionally designed for Zac Efron. I knew that I wanted him to play it before he even made it big.

Race - Egnotis

Gender - Male

Age - 23

Height - 5'11"

Weight - 165

Eyes - Turquoise

Clothes- Well fitted jeans. Button down shirts with the sleeves rolled up or white muscle tees.

Appearance - Tan skin. Very sharp features. Stone-faced, but hologram beautiful.

Family Ties - Brother of Elijah. Son of Peyton.

Relations With The Five Other Main Characters -

Elliot: Can't stand the bitch. Thinks she's like a freight train derailed. Also thinks that she has more testosterone than he does.

Elijah: The only person he loves. Tried to rescue him from Eldridge. Believes his prophetic dreams to be true.

Shae: Not much of a relationship yet. Adrian will find Shae's flirting techniques in ALASKAN TEMPEST somewhat amusing.

Ryan: Chemistry with Ryan is simply too easy to ignore. It's more like a game to Adrian. Ryan knows this and shamelessly doesn't care.

Jordan: Jordan's innocence is tantalizing, and this feeling explodes at the beginning of ALASKAN TEMPEST.

Favorite Book - Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad

Favorite Subject in School - Theatre

Love Interest - His relationship with Charlotte was severed when he made the decision to go rogue, although he still cares for her.

Secretly/Not So Secretly Loves - Anything sophisticated. Fashion (to a degree), status, and culture.

Secretly/ Not So Secretly Hates - The disarray of his morals

Obvious Personality Trait - Charming, Sharp, Devilish

Theme Song - Made Too Pretty - As Cities Burn

Let me take the next five minutes to scream in terror.

2009-07-29T12:01:00.000-07:00

First partial request with an attached synopsis.

The S word.

S-Y-N-O-P-S-I-S

And I don't care if you think I'm being over dramatic.

*Goes back into her cave*

Teaser Tuesday

2009-07-28T10:19:00.000-07:00

This is part of one of my favorite scenes. Tell me what you think.

THE ILLUMINATED - Chapter 22 - Jordan's POV

“What the hell just happened?” I screamed.

He shrugged casually. “Which part? The strong desire that you had to make out with me, or the sudden feeling of exhaustion?”

A wave of heat hit my face. I covered my look of terror with my hands. “Both!” I cried.

Elijah sighed and set the bowl of fruit in front of me. He began to cut the loaf bread with the knife on my nightstand, his mouth slack. “Yeah, I’m sorry. Adrian and I were having a war over you.”

I dropped my hands from my face. “What?”

Elijah sat on the bed and offered me a slice of bread and an apple. I took them both but had no desire to eat anything. I was ready to puke.

This morning,” he began, “before everyone left, Adrian and I were having a conversation about you, Shae, and Ryan and your hybrid-like virtues, and wondering how much of an influence we had over you. I told him that I thought our virtues effected you physically, like making you lose balance or consciousness. But I didn’t think that we would have an effect on you mentally, like making you feel a certain emotion or making you believe something.” He took a bite of his bread, chewed, and swallowed. “Adrian thought differently.”

My head began to swim. “Oh.”

“What just happened was kind of like bet being played out without a handshake or my full consent.” He looked down and fiddled with the apple in his hand. “Adrian won, obviously.”

I let out an embarrassed laugh that rang incredibly fake in my ears. “So, Adrian just made me completely infatuated with you?”

“Something like that. And I knew exactly what he was doing right when you turned and looked at me.” He made a failed attempt to force back a smile. “I could see it in your eyes. So, I made you really tired, because I knew if I didn’t get you out of there you were going to say something incredibly awkward.”

I breathed in deep, attempting to push the embarrassment away from my mind. It didn’t work. I groaned. “Did you see the look on Shae’s face?”

He pouted. “Yeah, that’s another reason why I wanted to get out of there.”

I continued to replay the event in my head, cringing when I remembered what I had said to Elijah when I was under Adrian’s spell. “I am so sorry,” I moaned, mustering up the most apologetic look I could.

I saw the confusion in his eyes. “For what?” he asked.

“For wanting to sleep with you.”

I was trying to be genuine, but the second the words came out of my mouth Elijah released a surprised, boisterous laugh that made me jump. He held his stomach and fell back on the bed.

I didn’t understand, and when he was done laughing he made out my dumbfounded expression. “Why on earth are you apologizing? It’s not like you were in control of your feelings. It was Adrian playing a terrible prank and proving me wrong. I’ll have to get him back.”

I hung my head. “I… I should have fought. I shouldn’t have fallen for it.”

He sat up instantly. “It’s not like that, Jordan. You don’t have a choice whether or not you want to fall for it. Besides, it wasn’t like suddenly you hated me and tried to kill me or something.” He chuckled. “Before I realized what was going on, I actually was flattered.”

There was a sudden awkwardness. When he reflected on what he had just said, his skin instantly turned a shade redder.

Character Profile - Elliot Kelly

2009-07-25T14:40:00.000-07:00

Simon kneeled at her feet. He smirked and looked up at the three of us who stood in the corner. “I fall in love with this beautiful Variean woman. Her gardens thrive when she is happy or content and our relationship is flawless. Only problem is, now I have the privilege of babysitting her wench of a sister.”

Elliot ripped her foot from the roots and kicked Simon in the jaw. He rebounded and rolled his eyes, as if no more than a butterfly had landed on his cheek. “See what I mean?”

Actor Choice - Have yet to find an actress that can pull off total badass without being sleezy. But I like the face of Aimee Teegarden.

Race - Variean

Gender - Female

Age - 22

Height - 5'3"

Weight - 135

Eyes - Brown

Clothes- Hoodies and jeans. If she dresses flashy, it's more towards rock and edgy.

Appearance - Long, chaotic brown hair that spirals to the bottom of her ribcage. Muscular and built like a tank. Sharp, intimidating features. Permanent sneer on her face.

Family Ties - Sister of Jeannette Montgomery

Relations With The Five Other Main Characters -

Adrian: The most terrifying, complicated relationship in the novel. Due to racial pride, both of them have a deep desire to kill one another, but are forced to work together under the circumstances of the plot.

Elijah: Thinks that he is pretty annoying and weak minded, but not nearly as irritating as Adrian.

Shae: Trusts him and finds him pleasantly obedient. She definitely thinks he's the least annoying hybrid at Eldridge.

Ryan: Elliot is Ryan's idol, and yet their personalities are the exact opposite. Elliot has wanted to strangle all of the giddiness out of Ryan on several occasions.

Jordan: Because of Jordan's solitude with Elijah, these two hardly come in contact with one another. Elliot sees Jordan as slightly weaker than the other hybrids, but this thought will disappear in ALASKAN TEMPEST.

Favorite Book - Elliot read? You kidding?

Favorite Subject in School - Dance (but she would never admit it to you)

Love Interest - Any guy willing to put up with her is practically signing a death warrant

Secretly/Not So Secretly Loves - Her wolves.

Secretly/ Not So Secretly Hates - Egnotis pricks who think they know everything.

Obvious Personality Trait - Brutish

Theme Song - I'm Made of Wax, Larry, What Are You Made of? - A Day to Remember

Character Profile - Jordan Adeline

2009-07-22T23:57:00.000-07:00

He grabbed my arm. I turned to face him. “What?” I asked, caught off guard. He stared at me quizzically, as though studying me like he had his entire life. What it must be like, to learn about an individual for so long and finally have the chance to come face to face with them… to touch them. My throat burned. I gazed into turquoise eyes for so long that I became numb.

Actor Choice - Have yet to find the one, but Emma Watson has a perfect face for the part

Race - Hybrid

Gender - Female

Age - 17

Height - 5'6"

Weight - 115

Eyes - Brown

Clothes- Jordan is seen often in sweaters and jeans. Nothing too flashy.

Appearance - Short, mousy brown hair. Has a thin dancer figure. Pale with thin lips and a light spray of freckles across her nose. Rarely wears makeup.

Family Ties - Daughter of Kevan and Lucy Adeline. Sister of Shae Adeline.

Relations With The Five Other Main Characters -

Adrian: Is a bit put off by Adrian at the beginning of THE ILLUMINATED and thinks he is nothing more than a nosey grump. She only observes him until close to the end, where she asks him for information on Elijah. Adrian is attracted to her, but Jordan doesn't know that, and never will.

Elijah: Jordan is openly wary of the mysterious boy. She finds out that her instincts were correct when he kidnaps her. She is attracted to Elijah because he's mysterious and hard to understand. He feeds her curiosity.

Shae: Shae and Jordan have a tight sibling bond. They understand each other very well. She thinks Shae is overly flirtatous and even cocky, but finds it more amusing than annoying.

Ryan: Jordan considers Ryan one of her best friends. They relate to each other on an intimate level through their gender and their race. In many situations, she treats Ryan like a sister.

Elliot: Jordan finds Elliot to be brutish and intimidating, but nevertheless interesting. There is a solitary moment in the garden when a few sentences are exchanged between them, and they connect on an intimate level. They will not connect again like this until ALASKAN TEMPEST, when they find out an interesting fact about the origin of their first names.

Favorite Book - Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

Favorite Subject in School - English

Love Interest - Mentioned that she used to be infatuated with Zacharius Roje, Ryan's older brother.

Secretly/Not So Secretly Loves - Uncovering the many hidden secrets about her past.

Secretly/ Not So Secretly Hates - Anything that is predictable, from college parties to drooling boys.

Obvious Personality Trait - Curious

Theme Song - Marvelous Things by Eisley

Marvelous Things (Eisley)

Video Code provided by MusicRemedy.Com

Racial Profile - The Hybrids

2009-07-22T12:12:00.000-07:00

"Once transformed, they will be, in fact, the most powerful beings on the face of the earth. With peace being so fragile on this planet, it is possible that this new powerful race will disrupt any equilibrium that we now see. If these children join the Egnotis, they will be lured and corrupted by power, longing only for the world to be under the tips of their fingers. If they choose to live a life against this ideal and the Egnotis’ power is threatened, then it may be the beginning of a full fledged war.”
“This is why, my dear girl, that you are so direly important. You, Jordan, along with your brother and the Roje children, are the first members in this generation of this powerful race. You are a hybrid.”

Hybrids are created through one Egnotis parent and one Variean parent. Because these two races are the exact opposite of each other, from thinking differently to having different morals (not to mention the fact that they're at war), hybrids are incredibly rare.

Virtues (Abilities):

Egnotis side:

- Controlling and channeling electricity-- powering lights and electric gadgets with their fingers (and sometimes with only their mind)
- Mind control
- Superb seduction and persuasion abilities-- heightened charisma
- Excellent memory
- Attractive physique

Variean side:

- Making plant life grow at will
- Control over water
- Healing minor wounds
- Communication with animals through emotion
- Heightened physical abilities, including eyesight, agility, strength, and balance

Facts: Hybrids appear to be completely normal until they undergo a transformation that occurs during a dream-like state. Until then, they may have subtle hints of being out of the ordinary. In Jordan's case, she was charismatic and smart, traits of an Egnotis. She was also fairly athletic and modest, traits of a Variean.

The transformation is performed by a Variean or Egnotis "guardian". The science behind this is still unknown. The guardian is able to send the hybrid into a dream-like state, where they receive a vision. If the guardian is Variean, the vision consists of the evil doings of the Egnotis, and vice-versa. The race of the guardian dictates the dominant traits of the hybrid. If a hybrid is transformed by an Egnotis, then their Egnotis side will be stronger, and vice-versa.

Rumor: The five hybrids that exist at the beginning of the 21st century could possibly become omnipotent. Maybe this explains why Elijah's father wants Jordan and Shae dead.

Hybrid characters in THE ILLUMINATED:

Jordan Adeline
Shae Adeline
Ryan Roje
Zacharius Roje
Alaura Roje

Time for the Tease

2009-07-21T16:22:00.000-07:00

Just got home from work. Time to get caught up on everyone's teasers! Be expecting comments from me in the next couple of hours.

This is a glimpse of the first Egnotis/Variean battle in THE ILLUMINATED.

THE ILLUMINATED - Chapter 19 (Ryan's POV)

“They’re here for us,” Shae whispered in my ear. A dull yellow light broke the dark--the generators must have kicked in. There was a sickening thud followed by a moan. I looked underneath the hanging clothes and saw only Adrian’s feet. Elliot was fighting them off.

The lights surged and dimmed. I heard more footsteps and thuds and imagined Elliot attacking whatever Egnotis had flooded into the store. I wished that I could see what she was doing. How many of them were there?

Adrian gave a start. A small pair of feet appeared next to his.

“Calm down Adrian, I’m not going to hurt you,” said a female voice. Her tone was soothing--so soothing that I was comforted by it. “You can tell your friends to come out. I know where they are hiding.”

Caught. I wanted to obey her beautiful voice. I tried to crawl back through the clothing, but Shae held me back.

“Charlotte?” Adrian was hesitant. “What are you doing here?”

“I was recruited by your father only moments after you had left. It was a wonderful opportunity, but a pity that I couldn’t do it with you.” She took a step forward. “Why, Adrian? Why are you doing this? Elijah’s actions were not surprising, but you? Your father is in despair because of what you have done.”

“Even if I tried to explain, Charlotte, you wouldn’t understand. Please—“

“Leave with us,” Charlotte cooed. “Come back and you can help us retrieve Jordan. We won't hurt them, but grow in numbers. Our powerful will be so beautiful Adrian--so beautiful. Please. You must.”

Her words tugged at something inside of me. I wanted to go with her. I wanted to give myself up.

The clothing rack shook as someone jumped over it. Another pair of feet leapt in between Adrian’s and Charlotte’s, feet clad in a pair of familiar boots.

“Well hello, sweetheart,” Elliot’s voice drawled. There was a crack and Charlotte’s body slumped to the ground. I examined her as she lay unconscious. A lovely red mark on her cheek showed the first sign of a bruise. She was Asian and gorgeous, with jet black hair and creamy skin. I would go far enough to call her angelic.

Adrian gave a moan of distaste. “Charlotte…”

“Let’s go!” Elliot roared. Shae pushed me forward and we emerged from the clothing rack. The lights were dim, and Elliot was in the process of disassembling several guns that she had taken from the unconscious Egnotis that littered the floor. She kept one, cocked it, and shot the registers at the front of the store, turned, and shot the registers at the cosmetic counter. The deafening fire made me jump.

I looked around at the five bodies. The man that had approached me while I was shopping was not one of them. There were still more Egnotis in the mall, which meant that Shae and I were still in danger.

Elliot ran and jumped up onto the nearest counter, allowing her a better view. Just as I had suspected, the familiar Egnotis came running through the corridor. He eyed Shae and I before turning to Elliot, his gun poised.

“Come down from there, little girl,” his thick accent boomed across the hall.

“Look around you, Logan,” Adrian yelled. He moved towards me. “Your people are on the ground. You won't win this. It's my decision.”

Logan didn’t take his eyes off of Elliot. “Do you think this is about you, Adrian? Your father hopes to never see yours or your betraying brother’s face again. Oh no, this... this has to do with property.” I saw his eyes glance at me and move back to Elliot. My insides began to burn.

Racial Profile - The Egnotis

2009-07-19T20:34:00.000-07:00

“The Egnotis,” Elijah told me. “Me.” His face was expressionless, yet his eyes were obviously searching mine for a reaction.
“You… what?” I didn’t understand.
“Jordan, I channel power.”
I scowled dramatically shrugged my shoulders. “What does that even mean? So according to what I know of you, what I know of your brother, and what Mr. Morgan is telling me, you’re charming and you don’t have a difficult time seducing people.” I twirled my finger in the air. “Big deal, in my species they call that good looks and a decent personality. Stop trying to turn it into a super power.”

Gabriel calls them the Channelers of Power.

Primary virtues (abilities) of this race include all aspects of energy, electricity, and influential power over the mind. Specific virtues include:

- Controlling and channeling electricity-- powering lights and electric gadgets with their fingers (and sometimes with only their mind)
- Mind control
- Superb seduction and persuasion abilities-- heightened charisma
- Excellent memory
- Attractive physique

Facts: Egnotis have access to all of their virtues equally. Their grasp on power has the tendency to make them hungry for more.

Rumor One: There is word that a person can become so entranced by an Egnotis that they are willing to sacrifice their soul to them. The Egnotis then has the ability to rip out their soul, change it into an electric form, and then animate the corpse. The corpse is completely self functional and logical, however they do not feel pain or emotion and gladly obey the orders of their Egnotis master. One only can imagine how dangerous their power in numbers would be.

Rumor Two: Elliot Kelly can tell you that she's no fan of Egnotis, especially ones who try to mind control her and instead accidentally give her a disturbing mental vision of her future.

Egnotis characters and mentioned Egnotis in THE ILLUMINATED:

Elijah De'Laine
Adrian De'Laine
Peyton De'Laine
Fallere Adeline
Kevan Adeline
Iris Roje
Logan
Charlotte

Racial Profile - The Variean

2009-07-17T17:02:00.000-07:00

Gabriel calls them the Bringers of Life

Primary virtues (abilities) of this race include everything that one needs to survive and sustain life. They dominate over the plant kingdom and are respected by animals. They have the reflexes needed to survive dire situations. Specific virtues include:

- Making plant life grow at will
- Control over water
- Healing minor wounds
- Communication with animals through emotion
- Heightened physical abilities, including eyesight, agility, strength, and balance

Facts: Variean have access to all of their virtues, but have one or two dominant ones. They lean towards modesty and are obviously connected with nature.

Rumors: It is said that a Variean has the ability to perform a sacrificial act, willing their life into someone who has died. Sometimes this act kills the Variean performing it, while the majority of the time the act kills the Variean and the subject remains dead. There have only been three documented occasions where the Variean managed to successfully revive their subject without killing themselves in the process, although the proceedure made them incredibly ill.

Variean characters and mentioned Variean in THE ILLUMINATED:

Elliot Kelly
Jeannette Montgomery
Simon Montgomery
Gabriel Morgan
Colleen Morgan
Lucy Adeline
Nelson Roje
Ian Stair

Character Profile - Elijah De'Laine

2009-07-16T18:09:00.000-07:00

I knew I was right, and so did Simon. We were living in the midst of havoc crammed into a cabin. A massive equation of hormones, superpowers, a bitchy girl with an illness, and a wise old guy that really wasn’t doing anything to stop it. I hated to think it, but I knew that I would be happier the second we were on our way to the Alaska, home of the Variean fort… my bitter racial enemies.

Actor Choice - Thomas Dekker

Race - Egnotis

Gender - Male

Age - 18

Height - 5'8"

Weight - 155

Eyes - Turquoise. He wears square-framed glasses.

Clothes - Due to his rich father and his prior need to "dress the part", Elijah's casual is dressy. When Jordan (POV) meets him he is wearing a peacoat, scarf, and boot-cut jeans, all designer (of course). In THE ILLUMINATED, he is never not seen in anything less casual then a button-up shirt. Things become a bit more close and personal in ALASKAN TEMPEST, and in several of Elijah's scenes he wears a t-shirt and sweats for pajamas.

Appearance - Raven-colored, Shaggy hair. Tends to intentionally "forget" to shave. Strong jaw. Looks older than eighteen. Attractive--but what Egnotis isn't?

Family Ties - Son of Peyton De'Laine. Brother of Adrian De'Laine.

Relations With The Five Other Main Characters -

Adrian: Tends to think highly of Adrian and trust him when no one else will. Elijah is the less radical of the two brothers. Elijah is the only one of the main characters that knows everything that Adrian is capable of.

Jordan: Was supposed to kill her, and instead goes against his father's intentions and brings her to Eldridge Estate. Elijah's and Jordan's relationship is incredibly awkward, and although they are a duo for most of THE ILLUMINATED and there are several instances of light physical contact, there is no evidence of a future relationship.

Shae: Elijah recognizes Shae's never-diminishing bitterness for kidnapping his sister. However, Shae asks Elijah to watch over Jordan at the end of THE ILLUMINATED, putting all hope in Elijah to keep his sister safe.

Ryan: Overly emphasizes how attractive she believes Elijah to be at the beginning of THE ILLUMINATED.

Elliot: Elliot is the one who finds Jordan and Elijah in the forest and brings them to Eldridge. Although she is seemingly bitter towards Elijah throughout THE ILLUMINATED due to his genetic makeup, but finds him a million times less annoying than his brother. Elijah has no obvious feelings towards Elliot in THE ILLUMINATED, but is incredibly sympathetic towards her at the beginning of ALASKAN TEMPEST, which Elliot thoroughly despises.

Favorite Book - Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Favorite Subject in School - History

Love Interest - Not Applicable (Yet)

Secretly/Not So Secretly Loves - The fact that the Variean want him in their company

Secretly/ Not So Secretly Hates - Power-hungry Egnotis

Obvious Personality Trait - Morally Just, Quiet

Theme Song -

Teaser Tuesday/ Guilty Pleasure for Yellow Canaries and Felix Felicis

2009-07-14T00:00:00.001-07:00

HBP in 24 hours!!! OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

I seriously cannot wait. I am bouncing up and down in my seat.

Premiere photo... isn't it adorable?

Okay... update on new query results. So far, 2 impersonal rejections, one highly personal rejection from an agent that usually doesn't respond to queries he doesn't like (claimed by novel sounded like XMEN, lol) and one request for the first five pages because I had forgotten to attach it. No great news, but not terrible either I guess. If the agent that requested my first five pages disliked the query, she would have probably flat out rejected me.

Now onto more pressing issues: I have recently rewritten Chapter Two of THE ILLUMINATED with satisfying results. Enjoy this snippet!

--------------------------

When I walked into the living room and grabbed my backpack from the coffee table, I heard a crash from the kitchen. Dad cursed loudly, and the lights surged. “You okay?” I hollered.

“Yes,” Mom replied calmly. “Dad just dropped a plate.”

“Did the lights freak out in there too?”

“Sure did. Maybe you should see where your brother disappeared to. He’s probably fooling around with some electronic gadget of his.”

But Shae wasn’t messing around with his electronics. His stereo wasn’t even on, which was unusual. It wasn’t until I flicked on the light in my room did I find out what he was up to.

He startled me, and I jumped back into the wall. “What the hell are you doing in here?”

Shae stood in the middle of my floor with his arms crossed. His eyes were bright with amusement as he gazed out the window next to my bed. He wore the biggest smirk I had ever seen in my life.

“Well that is just flat out poetic.”

I dropped my backpack and hurried to where he was standing. I followed his gaze and let out a guffaw, covering my mouth.

“Isn’t that the one that’s exactly your age too?”

Elijah was lounging on a bed in his newly acquired bedroom—the one room that happened to be directly across from mine.

“It’s just like the movies!”

“Oh, shut up,” I huffed, crossing my arms. I turned to see Shae staring at me with a stupid grin. “What?”

He pushed back his blonde, wavy hair. “So are you going to be a tease and change in front of the window every night?”

I socked his arm, but couldn’t hold back my laugh.

“Oh come on! I totally would if some cute girl my age moved into the bedroom across from mine.”

“You are so full of it.” I turned my attention back to the window. Elijah was propped up and reading a novel. His glasses rested on his flawless nose, and his hair fell across his forehead.

“I actually haven’t met that one yet.”

“That one?” I questioned.

Shae nodded towards the window. “Yeah. I met the dad, and someone who I’m guessing is the older brother. They were moving some of their stuff in when I came home from practice. Pretty nice… really well mannered. Anyways, the dad told me his youngest son was around my age.”

“It’s Elijah.”

Shae took a step back. “What?”

I sighed. “His name is Elijah, and he’s a year older than you… my age. I met him today.”

“Ha! The plot thickens!”

I slapped my forehead. “Oh my gosh…”

“Sooner or later you’ll be sending love letters back and forth via a string and coat hanger contraption.”

“Don’t you even want to know how I met him?” I asked, attempting to sway the course of the conversation.

Shae put his hand on his hip and faced me. “Okay,” he began dramatically. “How did you meet him?”

I raised an eyebrow at his stance. “At a wall. A massive, ancient-looking wall.”

His arm dropped to his side. “A wall?”

“Yeah,” I replied. “Did you have any idea that there is a huge barrier… property line… something back in the woods?

“What woods?”

“Behind our house, with the little path, and the creek… you know, straight east.”

He looked up in thought for a moment and shook his head. “Mom and Dad always told us not to go back there when we were little, so I haven’t been back that far.”

“I know, me neither,” I said, sitting down on my bed. “But it just so happens that the one day I decide to take a walk solely for the sake of a scenery change happens to be the day that the De’Laines move in, and just so happens to be around the time that Elijah was exploring the same area.”

“So you met him… at this wall.” Shae shot me a look of disbelief. “Maybe he’s your stalker or something.”

My blatant eye rolling was disrupted by a short vibration. I picked up Shae’s cell phone from on top of my comforter.

“Oh sorry,” he muttered. “I must have dropped it when I was pushing apart your curtains.”

I nosily flipped through his three new text messages. “What were you doing in here anyway?”

“Shamelessly spying on the new neighbors, of course.”

The messages were from three different girls—not shocking in the slightest. Shae was Mr. Charisma at Presque Isle High. However, when I read over the name on the last message, I scoffed in disbelief. “Jasleen White?”

Shae snatched his phone from my hand. “Whoa there. Invasion of privacy.”

“Jasleen White! Are you kidding me? She’s a sophomore in college… she’s a year older than me!”

Shae’s expression instantly turned smug, and he tossed his phone into the air and caught it. “And?”

“And you’re a junior in high school!”

He raised an eyebrow, his smile unbearably painful to look at. “You underestimate me, dear sister.” He made his way to the door. “But I’ll leave you alone to spy on your devilishly attractive new window buddy; I have to call Ryan anyways.” He swiftly exited the room and shut the door, narrowly escaping the pillow that I threw in his direction.

Possibly Leaving the World of YA

2009-07-10T00:11:00.000-07:00

That's right folks. After much research and current query woes, I may begin to market my novel as strictly fantasy. Now, this doesn't mean that I don't think my novel is YA or don't wish that I could market it as YA, but my MCs are simply too old for the shelf slots next to UGLIES and GOSSIP GIRLS. I have the feeling that my rejections have been partly related to the fact that dear Jordan is a freshman in college.

Of course I will still be involved in all of the YA happenings on AW and still post in OPWFT, because I still believe in my heart that my book is geared towards older teens. I hope this is ok with all of my blog circle ladies.

In other news, I have given into the social networking demon, and I now TWEET.

Check it.

2009-07-08T23:26:00.000-07:00

Lookie where I was yesterday.

Yosemite is pretty kick butt for writing inspiration. Actually thought up a new paranormal thriller idea while up there. Jesse and I drove to the high sierras to avoid the tourism, and it was totally worth the time and gas. Absolutely breathtaking.

So I am pretty sure the all of the agents have died. I haven't heard back from anyone lately, and I have several queries still floating around. I hate being forced to be patient! Anyways:

News for the day: I'm going to attempt to completely rewrite some of my craptastic chapters in The Illuminated and see how they turn out. I'm hoping for success. Wish me luck!

Teaser Tueday!

2009-07-07T00:05:00.000-07:00

I apologize for the fact that I won't be able to read everyone else's teasers until Wednesday due to a busy schedule, but I can't wait to get to them!

Excerpt for Chapter Four of Alaskan Tempest (Elliot's POV)

When the sun had set in the sky, I heard a rapping at the door. Jordan entered and lifted her hand, the two bedroom lamps flickering on. Her cheeks were flushed and the tip of her nose was bright red from being out in the cold. She smiled at me, and I felt the jealousy swell.

“How is it outside?” I asked.

She shrugged. “It’s nice, I guess. I wasn’t out there for very long. I spent most of the day reading.”

It took everything I had in me to not roll my eyes. I watched her walk to the closet, picking up a laundry basket and moving over to our dresser, where she began to empty the contents of her drawers. “What are you doing?”

She paused, as if contemplating whether or not she should really answer the question. “I’m moving.”

“I wish you wouldn’t.” I hated the thickness of my own voice.

She looked at me awkwardly and bit her lip—the innocent Jordan look. “Oh come on Elliot. It won’t be too bad. It’s for your own good anyways.”

“What are you, my mother?”

She scowled and was about to respond, but when Adrian came into the room with his suitcase, her eyes widened and she quickly busied herself with her clothes as he knelt next to her. Perhaps she was expecting a blowout between us… again.

I certainly didn’t want to stick around in the midst of Adrian unpacking. I was feeling better, and was almost positive that dinner was soon. That would be my escape excuse.
I needed to be fluid with my movements to avoid Jordan or Adrian saying anything about me needing to stay in bed—not like I would listen if they did. But I still wanted to act Variean, and not like a sick little girl.

Even swinging my feet over the edge of the mattress hurt like hell. The floor felt unusually cool, sending new streaks of pain up my legs. But I wouldn’t let that stop me.

This would be easy.

As soon as I had left the mattress, Adrian was up. I was expecting it to be hard, but not like this. My legs were as helpful as wet dough, and the second I was up the splitting pain attacked my knees. Adrian dove and caught me awkwardly, my arms entwining around his neck.

At his touch, a heavenly relief coursed through my body.

I was terrified to look at his face for fear of a completely disgusted reaction. Amidst my utter embarrassment came a virtual slap in the face—my pride was a disease. I was in so much pain… so much misery, and yet I could easily get rid of it all if I took part in an ego-killing reliance.

I did the only thing I could do. I laughed.

SSS- Take Two - Killing my darlings / Book Review

2009-07-06T16:43:00.000-07:00

Announcement for the day - Check out my book review, along with Annie McElfresh's here.

And on with my Satiating Summer Sessions Take Two and Three:

I am combining these two simply because they belong together. I kept receiving complaints that the beginning of The Illuminated had a lot of great character-building scenes, but caused the book to move way to slowly. So yesterday I took my virtual chainsaw (also known as the backspace key) and removed 3,000 words from the first three chapters.

3,000. That is a lot of useless rambling.

It's funny, cause when you start a novel you think that you are going to need all of this wordy description about characters and their backstory, but you end up just re-explaining it all as the novel is rolling along.

I'm a dork. Especially because I don't think cutting 3,000 is enough. I'll probably have to go over it again and cut some more stuff that I hate to give up.

It's Already Tuesday? I Need to Blog More!

2009-06-30T00:00:00.001-07:00

Just a couple announcements before I go on with my teaser.

Announcement #1- So currently all of my fulls have come back in with big fat Rs, meaning that I am back at lonely square one for now. Kind of a depressing place to be, but I guess I'll just have to suck it up.

Announcement #2- I am going to begin blogging with my writing sisters over at Absolute Write. Catch us in action!

Announcement #3-Brand Spankin' New Photoshoot. Please excuse me while I go take a cold shower.

Ladies and Gentlemen... well, mainly Ladies: Meet Mr. Thomas Dekker, my ultimate actor choice for either Elijah or Adrian. I think I'm in love.

Announcement #4- You know what else I'm in love with? Primes.

ON WITH THE TEASER!

The Illuminated Chapter 34 (Ryan)

“Adrian, stay up here,” Elliot ordered. “Keep a look out.”

“We’re not going down there, are we?” Shae asked, his voice quivering. “Elliot, what if there are a lot of them? There are three of us! We could die!”

“I’ll go first,” Adrian suggested.

“I said, you stay up here,” Elliot growled.

Adrian spun around to face her. He grabbed Elliot’s collar and pulled her close. She could have easily thrown him off, but she stood still, allowing him to get in her face.

“Although you think that I am nothing, although you keep telling yourself that my presence here is a waste of time, these things were designed to obey my command. Now, keeping this in consideration, do you still think that it would be in your best intention to force me to sit and stay on the sidelines while you attempt a suicide mission?”

Elliot’s face fell flat. Her nostrils flared and she pressed her lips together. “It doesn’t matter,” she said softly. “You don’t care about me.”

Adrian sneered. “You’re right. I don’t. But I’m not going to allow you to do this and risk Shae’s and Ryan’s life.” He wrapped his hands around Elliot’s jaw, forcing her to to look at him. “I don’t care what you want to believe about me, but I am on your side. I. Am. On. Your. Side,” he boomed.

It was then that it clicked. Elliot’s physical virtues… Adrian’s mental ones… together, they would be unstoppable.

“Stop fighting against each other, and fight together,” I ordered. I was not going to play nice anymore. This stalling was going on for far too long. I motioned everyone to come close so we wouldn’t be overheard. “Shae and I will split and watch from the woods. We’ll ambush any time that we feel that the fight is getting out of control.”

Come to me, I need you.

“You two have this. Together, both of you are capable are taking on whatever is waiting for us in that pool.”

Come help. It is time. Do not hurt Adrian. I tried to turn my thoughts into emotions. I heard the wolf pack approach. Bastien and the rest of the pack flew up the hill and were at my side. He looked up at me with respect, his coat flat from the rain, droplets falling off the end of his nose. I smiled.

Help Elliot.

Moments of Bliss

2009-06-26T22:22:00.001-07:00

To the Friday Night Writes folks:

I love you.

To Steve Jablonsky:

If I ever meet you, I will kiss you for all of the many inspirational moments you have given me.

To Leah:

We pwn. And you know it.

I'm almost finished with the first glorious two chapters of Alaskan Tempest. I am enjoying myself most thoroughly, and am falling in love with my characters all over again.

Teaser Tuesday / 38 Satiating Summer Sessions - Take One

2009-06-23T12:28:00.000-07:00

My posts seem to always be eighty-million miles long on Tuesday.

On a side note before I start my business: It is beautiful outside. I'm actually ready for summer this year.

So, now for the big announcement... *plays epic trumpet music* I'm starting a new summer blogging event for myself, something that I think will be interesting to log. You see, I have 36 chapters, a prologue, and an epilogue in my finished, unpublished novel, equaling to 38 sections of writing.

Now, I am almost satisfied with it. I have read over my manuscript four times and have gotten MOST of the face errors out, but I still think that I could do better with character development and language. I have a goal of making my novel as literary as possible while still remaining in the realm of YA UF. So here's what I am going to do:

Over the course of the rest of the summer, I am going to document 38 summer sessions where I write about killing off my darlings (great pieces of text that no longer fit with the story) developing character quirks (Did you know that Jordan wears two braided bracelets around her right hand and Ryan wears a ton of eye makeup? I didn't either!) and explaining the annoying things the author does to move the story along (Jordan, Ryan, and Elliot... they're all girls!!! Yes, there is a plot-related and metaphorical reason... no, it's not just because I love girls with butch names, although that's partly it). Every session will be chapter related... not detailed enough for blog readers to not be able to understand what's going on without having read the manuscript, but broad, facing problems that many (if not all) writers come across and how I personally overcome them.

I urge you to join me if you have a finished work and would like to attempt to perfect it to the best of your ability. I love reading about other writers' adventures.

My first satiating summer session will be at the bottom of my teaser, about my teaser. This is the LAST time I am posting a whole chapter on Tuesday, and the only reason why I am doing it this time is because I really want feedback relating to interest. If you picked up a book and this was the first chapter, is it gripping enough for you to continue reading? Be honest, please. I strive off of honesty. :-)

On to chapter one! Cant wait to read everyone's blogs today!!

CHAPTER ONE
CASTLE HILL'S SECRET

I had never been this far back before.

Taking an afternoon walk was a great decision, and what motivated me to keep at my pace was the way the sun sparkled off the golden autumn leaves and the grass, left wet by this morning’s storm. It was captivating enough for me to not turn around, and I was persuaded by its beauty to wrap my arms snuggly around my torso and continue to venture deep into the Maine forest behind my home.

I walked three miles, taking the time to bask in the gentle shower of crisp red and orange leaves. My camera had been attached to my hand since I had left home. I captured all of the signs of autumn: the brook that ran from north to south, the leaves placed in patterns against the soft ground, the small pathway winding through the many pine and ash trees. They were enormous in this part of the woods, blocking out most of the daylight during the afternoon, leaving the air cool and damp. The forest was so thick that I was forced to stay on the small dirt path.

It was the first time in years that I had walked all of the way to the brook that was a mile east of my house. I was not ready to turn around, so for the first time I walked all of the way across the bridge and continued down the narrow path.

After hours of exploring and taking photos, the sun had sunk close to the horizon behind me, lighting the trees and the ground on fire and setting everything aglow. The wind gave me a natural high and I shook my head, allowing it to graze through the short locks of my dark hair. I breathed in the scent of the damp ground and the sweet aroma of the surrounding canopies.

The silence was stunning. I took a moment to close my eyes, listening to the quickness of my own breath intermingled with the wind, falling in line with the sound of my footsteps. There was no other sound but these three. My excitement built, my heart beating faster. I had forgotten how much I adored the woods. I let my camera hang around my neck, freeing my hands so that I could press them against the trunks that I passed, the bark rough and moist under the tips of my fingers.

The overgrown path seemed to go on forever. It was no more than two feet wide, its soil dark from the rain. I knew little about where this path would lead me. In fact, the only thing that I did know was that the next town or state road was miles away. I continued to walk for over a half hour as my path weaved through the trees, the sky growing darker. The colors around me began to change from yellows and oranges to grays and deep blues. Tranquil colors. I could have slept on the path that night.

I thought of turning around and heading back home when the bottom of my feet began to ache, but something caught my eye.

I couldn’t see any trees ahead. What my eyes focused on instead was a dark, looming barrier.

I stopped and stared. Slowly I walked forward, noticing that the periwinkle color of the sky above the horizon seemed to suddenly disappear.

The closer that I walked, the more the barricade in front of me began to reveal itself.

I had definitely never been back this far.

A moss covered stone wall towered above me. I walked close to it and pressed my hand against its rich texture. It was at least four times my height.

It looked ancient.

Thick vines twisted up its length, disguising its once formal appearance. My bracelet caught on one of them, and I pulled back until my wrist was free. The dirt layers made telling its original color impossible. Its stones were jagged and seemed have fallen out of alignment with each other, making some protrude farther than others.

The western sun hid behind the overgrowth, leaving me in shadow. Although I should have been heading home, curiosity got the best of me. I glanced to my right and left, searching for a possible door or gate embedded in the wall’s surface. Unfortunately, I saw nothing except for the unbroken border stretching in both directions, much farther than my eyes could see in this light.

How many years had this beautiful structure been here, becoming more deformed with the passing time without anyone around to awe at its magnificence? I was stunned. I had no idea that something this breathtaking resided so close to home. I knew nothing about its purpose, and whether it was created for scenery, as some sort of memorial, or as something else.

“Castle Hill seems to be holding many secrets, doesn’t it?”

I felt a sudden jolt in my chest as panic struck me. I pressed my hand to my heart and swung around to where the voice had come from. My eyes met with those from a boy merely thirty feet from me, his back pressed against the trunk of a tree as he casually stood with his arms crossed, as if he had been there the entire time. I had not seen him when I approached the wall. I shoved my hand in my purse in search of mace, a knife… anything. Unfortunately my quick reflexes added to my paranoia.

He wore a buttoned black pea coat and had the collar popped. I could see his stunning turquoise eyes and the glint of amusement that he wore from where I was, even behind his square-framed glasses.

He was just a boy.

“You scared me,” I breathed and leaned against the nearest tree for support, removing my hand from my purse. I eyed him warily; I still had no idea who he was, or why he happened to be three miles back into this part of the woods surrounding Castle Hill. “What are you doing here?”

The boy chuckled. His laugh was light and musical, but I still took a step back.

“I’m so sorry. I just moved to the neighborhood a few miles back,” he pointed in the direction that I had come from, sighing and scratching his head. “I was sick of being stuck in the house all day unpacking, so I snuck out to explore the area. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

I shook my head, still clutching my chest. “You surprised me is all,” I stated, adjusting the scarf wrapped around my neck. I felt quite warm. “I’ve actually never been back this far, so to meet someone here on the only day that I do come is strange.”

The boy nodded. “What’s your name?” he asked me, appearing to grow more amused with every passing second. I realized that I still probably looked like a deer caught in the headlights, and quickly did my best to compose myself.

“Jordan,” I replied softer than I had meant to.

“You an Adeline?”

“I… uh… how did you—”

“We met your parents as we were moving our stuff in the house. Very nice people. I live right next to you.”

“Oh! Well, it’s nice to meet you.” That was right. The house next to ours was vacant. I had no idea that a new family was planning on moving in.

“Elijah.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Elijah.”

He nodded towards the wall. “What’s this?”

I shrugged and looked back at the enormous structure. “I seriously wish I knew. I wasn’t lying when I said that I’d never been back this far.”

He walked up to the wall and ran his fingers lightly over the surface. He grasped at a piece of moss growing in the crevice of two of the stones with his right hand and ripped it out. As he turned to look at me, I immediately glanced away. “How long have you lived here?” he asked almost absentmindedly.

“Umm… since I was like, one and a half.”

“How old are you?”

I raised an eyebrow. Elijah noted my expression and grinned. We both knew that he was being nosey. “I’m eighteen.”

“Still in high school?”

“No.”

“Well, that’s good,” he stated. He began to walk down the length of the old wall towards me, still studying it. “That means we’re the same.” He drew near to me and gave me a weak grin. His face was unshaven and he had a strong jaw, making him look much older than eighteen. He was only a couple of inches taller than I was. The closer he walked, the less uncomfortable I became. My stomach unclenched, and I took a deep breath.

“College?” he asked.

“University of Maine, over in Presque Isle. You?”

“Next semester I’ll start,” he said. “With the move and everything, it was rough starting this fall.”

“I see.” I moved my hand over the rough stones of the wall. “Why didn’t you just live on campus?”

Elijah flashed a crooked smile. His teeth seemed to glow in the shadow of the setting sun. He lifted his hand off the wall and ran his fingers through his shaggy, raven-colored hair.

“I’m not ready to leave my dad yet, or my brother. They mean a lot to me.”

I couldn’t help but smile. “That’s really nice.”

“Yeah. I’m pretty sure my brother feels the same way. He’s 25 and still lives with us. I met yours by the way. Shae, right?”

I nodded. Elijah must have run into Shae when he was coming home from his soccer game. “Yep, that’s him.”

“He seems like a nice guy.” Elijah looked back at the vanishing beams of the sun. “Were you about to head home?”

I eyed the wall. “Well I was until I found this, and I was sort of interested by it. I want to come back here with Shae.”

“Quite the sight, isn’t it?”

“I’ll say.”

“And you don’t know why it’s here?”

I shook my head. “I should know. I’ve lived here all of my life.”

Elijah smiled. “Well, it looks as though you have a bit of researching to do.” He winked.

I laughed. “You’re right. I am curious now.”

He moved away from the wall. “Do you mind if I walk back with you?”

I pulled my coat tighter against my chest. As the thought of how coincidental it was that this boy was in the same part of the forest at the same time as I was continued to linger, I forced it to the back of my head. It would be something worth thinking about later. I began to walk on the path toward home. “No, I wouldn’t mind at all.”

SATIATING SUMMER SESSION - TAKE ONE

I strive to make my MC interesting.

My first chapter defines her as being curious, and what I changed with this read through is mentioning her quick reflexes. I feel as though I don't concentrate enough on what makes Jordan unique before we really find out what is unique about her. I personally want to fall more in love with her as a character, so I think I will enjoy adding in more of her quirks within the first ten chapters.

With revamping this chapter, I have discovered that it is always super fun to go back and add subtle foreshadowing when you already know how your novel is going to pan out. Am I right? Because, in all honesty, unless you stick to a strict Outline, you don't know what twists and turns your imagination will throw at you when writing. Even feelings, glances, the way a character views an object... those can all be types of foreshadowing, which I love.

I AM WORDY WITH WORDS THAT AREN'T FUN TO BE WORDY WITH! UGH!

Me, I, Nearly, Almost, Seemed, Began, Immediately

And for this specific chapter:
Wall, Horizon, Moss, Stone, Boy, Path, Trees

Apparently, I don't know how to use a thesaurus... apparently.

Up Against a Wall--A.K.A Suspense Fail

2009-06-20T11:39:00.000-07:00

So I have been thinking about the beginning of my novel. Yes... thinking, contemplating, etc. I've had three agents either not request the full from a partial or lose interest at the beginning because it was too slow for them, making them not read the rest. So, using my incredibly terrible logic skills, I came to the conclusion that I needed a first chapter that really jumped out and grabbed the reader's attention before going into too much description about the MC, her friends, and the real situation of the novel. So, I wrote a new one, which then created a new subplot. I still wasn't too sure about it, so I posted it on AW for feedback.

Feedback came in this morning. It sucks.
It makes sense. It's not nearly as well written as my other first chapter. It doesn't have as much MC development, and I mainly wanted to get to the suspense quick enough to draw an agent in in the first five pages, but unfortunately the whole thing just ended up really cheesy.

So I cut the chapter back out and pasted it in a separate files document until I have decided its fate.

So here's where I stand. I don't know if the beginning of my book really is boring or if the agents are too busy/didn't fit their exact cup of tea/etc. I've read over the first few chapters so many times that they're boring to me, but does that mean they're boring to other readers? Has anyone else had this problem?

New Layout

2009-06-18T00:44:00.001-07:00

I designed this one myself. Let me know what you guys think! (P.S. - It's themed for my novel)

Starting From Scratch / Teaser Tuesday

2009-06-16T13:41:00.000-07:00

There are many things I have learned from ALMOST snagging an agent.

Thing #1- Don't agree to an exclusive. Agents will most likely want to see your work anyway if you tell them that you can't grant them one. On an exclusive, I couldn't send out another requested full for nearly an entire month, and it allowed the agent who asked for the exclusive to wait until the very last second to read it, because she knew that she was the only one who had it.

Thing #2- UPS and FedEx can burn in hell. FedEx took a week and a half to get my manuscript to the agent, while the postal service will only take three days. I had no idea that FedEx was going to make the agent sign for the manuscript because they didn't ask, and they were expensive to ship from.

Thing #3- If you don't have a laser printer, support your local print shop. I moved from a city to a small town in the past few weeks. Kinkos was expensive, slow, and impersonal, while my local print shop took less than fifteen minutes and were very friendly.

Thing #4- In my opinion, snail mail queries get better responses. I sent out a ton of email queries and only received one request for a partial. I sent out ten snail mail ones and received two requests for fulls. You do the math.

Thing #5- Sure, it's fun to get your hopes up. I had an agent request a partial six days from the time I sent out my query and call me on the phone two days later, asking for my full. Yes, it did sting a little bit when I received a one-sentence email from her a month later sounding like she didn't even read it (I'm not making false accusations. I don't know if she did or not). Whatever happens, keep pushing, and stay smart. Continue to remind yourself that YOU are the one in power, and eventually the agent that decides to represent you is going to make money off of YOU. Stay professional, stay strong, and no matter how many fulls and partials you have out there or how many times you get rejected, get a new batch of queries out there every two weeks.

Okay, vent over :-) TEASER TIME!!!

The Illuminated- Prologue

Peyton took a deep breath and descended down the steps.

He had not been down here in what felt like ages, a fact that he was particularly proud of. How anyone could spend more than one day in this filthy excuse for living quarters was beyond him. Luckily, he was far too important to be wasting time away in a tunnel. He had things to accomplish.

He didn’t walk too close to the grime-encrusted walls. His dress shirt and slacks were fairly new, and it was only the beginning of the day. He wouldn’t have time to change. He grimaced at his soiled shoes. Was everyone too busy down here to take a broom to the floor every once in a while? He could hardly see the cobblestone.

He hurried quickly between the dugout walls, the upcoming lanterns beginning to glow while the ones behind him faded and died. He made out the sound of dripping water mixed with… were they footsteps? The tunnel lights in the distance solidified the notion that someone was indeed approaching. The silhouette of a man grew larger, his footsteps becoming more prominent with the passing time. The next lantern sprang to life, and Peyton smiled.

“Good morning, Logan.”

Logan’s teeth gleamed in the dull light, his green eyes brightening. “It’s good to see you, old friend.”
“Where is he?”

Logan nodded, acknowledging that he understood. “The fellowship chamber. I believe he is waiting for you.”

Peyton sneered. “Chamber? Cell would be a more proper word. This place is death.”

Logan lifted his hands, every lantern in the passageway erupting. He smirked, his eyes narrowing. “I resent that comment. I’ve had to spend many a week here in the past few years. Cozy, if you ask me.”

Peyton couldn’t tell if he was joking. The light revealed every crack in the dried mud… every rogue root embedded in the ceiling… every patch of mold. “Yes—cozy.”

“I’ll let you go on your way.”

“Goodbye, Logan.”

The air grew staler as the earth slanted downward. Peyton heard voices echo through the hallway—new recruits having a conversation in a room somewhere. Charlotte’s he recognized instantly—smooth and velvety, like a lullaby. There were others too. Five at least.

The fellowship chamber was at the base of the tunnel system—passageways that weaved below a stretch of land, encompassing over a mile. He entered the circular room. There were five banquet tables, each stretching over ten feet. There was enough space to seat fifty.

A large television sat at the back of the room, looking incredibly out of place against the dirt walls. It was set to a popular news channel, the sound turned all of the way down. A man was seated at the middle table, his back turned towards Peyton as he watched the flashing pictures. Peyton did not need to see his face to know who he was.

“Please sit down,” the man asked without turning his head. He wore a collared button-down shirt, its color matching his thinning white hair.

“I came here only because you asked to see me. You know I won’t be staying long. I have unpacking to do.”

The man turned around. Wrinkles defined his age, although his features had not faded with the years. He was handsome, and would be until the day he died. “Very well,” he stated. He looked to the side, avoiding Peyton’s eyes as he spoke. “I am undoubtedly impressed by your family.”

“We have only done what you have asked of us,” Peyton replied.

“Your loyalty is unmatched,” he continued, “which is why I have trusted you with the task at hand.”

Peyton gave a curt nod. He understood.

The man turned to gaze at Peyton. His strong jaw clenched on his unsmiling face. “And you are willing to do this freely?”

Peyton glanced at the ground and away from the eyes of the man. He was not afraid—he hadn’t felt fear in a long time. He simply hated taking orders. “Her age does not intimidate me. I have killed younger.”

“Not you, Peyton.”

Peyton looked up, his eyes narrowing.

“Prepare your youngest,” the man ordered.

“He’s had enough!” Peyton growled, slamming his fist onto the nearest table. This man would not control his son. “He has killed already once this week, at your demand!”

“And yet, he is still not nearly as strong as your oldest,” he replied calmly.

Peyton forced his eyes shut, breathing in and out as slowly as he could manage. He couldn’t keep his balled up fist from shaking. “Why is it so easy for you to demand her death when she is family… your family?”

The man stood, brushing the creases out of his slacks and checking his watch. He looked to Peyton, his eyebrow raised. They locked eyes for a long moment, and the man cocked his head slowly, the corners of his mouth turning up. “I am demanding nothing.” He strode past Peyton swiftly, grabbing his jacket from a nearby table. “I am simply letting fate play its hand.”

DoH. Idiocy Wednesday I guess.

2009-06-10T11:26:00.000-07:00

So APPARENTLY my exclusive was not two weeks, but a month. I feel very stupid considering I emailed this morning, and she emailed me back with a nicer version of "Err... I still have five more days." DOH!

How does one mix up two weeks and a month? That I don't know.

GOOD NEWS!

She revealed to me that her first reader liked it very much and she will be reading it over the weekend. Now, I did recently go through a printed copy of my manuscript and found a CRAPTON of errors. I really pray to God that she doesn't hold them against me, because right now my odds are looking good.

TEASER TUESDAY! (Shh... It's still tuesday!)

2009-06-10T00:09:00.000-07:00

This is one of the few pieces I have written for Alaskan Tempest. Enjoy, because I sure had a hell of a time writing it. :-)

“Why did you trade Ryan for me?” I growled, trying to sound as menacing as possible. I didn’t want to ride in the freaking BMW.

He slid on his wide, silver shades and brushed his hair back, holding his car controller over his shoulder to unlock the doors. I watched as Jordan and Elijah made their way into the back seat. He smirked. “Because—darling—every moment with you is an adventure.”

I performed my best sneer and crossed my arms. “Care to elaborate, darling?”

He leaned against the silver hood. “Oh well… I don’t know, let me think. How about we start off with the moment that we met. You punched me in the face, didn’t you? Ah yes, you did. And then, it was only a day later that you knocked out my girlfriend, followed by jumping on top of me from a balcony and beating the pulp out of me. But then, God knows why, you drain your life to save mine, and a few months later you tell me that we’re supposed to have a baby together, followed by yet another punch in the face.”

It took all I had to suppress my laughter. I kept my frown. “Your point?”

He pressed his lips together, the right corner slowly rising. He was loving every second of this. “My point is, sweetheart,” he began, obviously trying his best to make his voice as deep and melodic as possible. “I feel like the little fat kid playing Red Rover… I see a glint of light here and there, only to be thrown on my back with the wind knocked out of me and a bloody nose.” He pushed away from the car and leaned in close, looking at me over the top of his sunglasses. I narrowed my eyes. “You’re simply so intriguing that I wouldn’t mind the risk of losing my teeth again to spend a road trip with you, so get in.”

He turned and strode to the driver’s side door, opened it, and slid into the seat. I stood for mere seconds, my teeth clenched together so tightly that I was already getting a headache, my hands balled up so that my fingernails were digging into my skin. I finally relaxed, took a breath, and walked towards the passenger side door.

Damn it. It wouldn’t be so bad if the son-of-a-bitch wasn’t charming.

Reasons why I love YA

2009-06-08T00:00:00.000-07:00

Okay, so here I am, about to enter my last year of my undergraduate studies as an English major. Shouldn't I be interested in classics, or at least something with a little more oomph than what most people would consider teen novels? I simply can't help it. Every time I pick up a novel in my spare time it is usually something YA. Why, you may ask? Well I have composed a list of compelling reasons:

1. Imagination- The only imaginative plots that I have really seen in adult fiction is in flat genre. I really don't like FLAT genre... hardcore scifi, epic fantasy, paranormal thriller... boring. I like a little bit of literary mixed in with a lot of creativity. I find this in very few books that aren't Young Adult.

2. Angst- I love angst... LOVE it. I don't know why, but reading gritty, raw emotion in young people is like a serious guilty pleasure for me. Since YA books are focused on TEENAGERS... well, you know.

3. In the teen world, people may not take you as seriously as someone who may only be five years older than you. This is an obstacle than many YA protagonists have to overcome, which I find interesting. It's obviously harder to complete a mission if no one believes you or supports you.

4. The sex is good- I like at least a little sexual tension in my reading material. In YA, there is sometimes a strong forbidden feeling, and usually it is a new, raw experience for the MC or other characters. They have to balance morals, passion, lust, infatuation, and many other arising factors into the equation. There is confusion and uncertainty. There is love. There is MORE angst. There is the overhanging cloud of whether or not to remain abstinent until old enough to take responsibility. There are raging hormones... lots and LOTS of raging hormones.

5 Freedom from the real world- No nine-to-five job, no kids, no husband or wife, no financial responsibility (disclaimer: this is usually but NOT always the case). The author doesn't have to waste time incorporating these factors in. More time for fun stuff! (God, I'm shallow)

Move over social networking, and make room.

2009-06-06T23:30:00.000-07:00

Facebook, myspace... it's all been the same for me lately. Same news, same people, same "wanna hang out? call me." Bulletins. Just recently I started to reflect on what I did before the whole networking craze, and remembered my first love.

A Crazy Fan Forum. Xanga.

So a couple of weeks ago, that's what I did. I joined a writers forum and dusted up this blog, renovating it to talk about my writing adventures.

I have to say, it is SO much more bubbly-making (go go Scott Westerfeld!) than any other form of social networking I'm involved with these days.

But why?

I think it is because through forums and blogging, I connect with people who are more interested in the same things that I am rather than connecting with simply people that I'm acquainted with. Does that make sense? I don't know really, I'm just ranting now. It's late, and I have work and some WoW pwning (a.k.a. filming for youtube) to be involved with tomorrow.

So I will leave you with a teaser from The Illuminated:

“What did you do?!” Elliot boomed.

I felt a pair of small, yet terribly strong hands grasp my shoulder and drag me from under the table. Elliot pulled me to my feet, and I managed to stumble to my chair. I squinted and blinked, an array of multicolored dots blinding me. When my vision adjusted, I saw everyone in the room standing defensively, staring intently at Elijah as if he was some sort of dangerous criminal, all except for Gabriel who continued to sit at the head of the table, his hands folded in front of him as he gazed upon me with a highly amused expression. Elliot breathed heavily next to me. Colleen stood behind her chair, grasping the back of it as if ready to use it as a weapon if needed. Simon was shielding Jeannette, his arms partially out as he protected her from peril. Jeanette clutched the back of his garments, gaping in wide-eyed terror at Elijah.

“You broke the chandelier!” Gabriel exclaimed gleefully.

Elijah’s mouth hung open as he stared at the mess of strewn glass that covered the table and the stone floor.

“I… I was angry,” he stuttered.

Gabriel clapped his hands together. “I noticed!” He beamed, the only one in the room not in a state of anger, confusion, or shock. “No matter. It was fun while it lasted.” He looked around the room. “Everyone seems to be having issues with sitting in one place for more than a period of five minutes.”

Simon ushered Jeanette to sit, but he and Elliot remained standing. I refused to budge, my mouth hanging open.

Elijah sulked to the closest chair. “I ruined your chandelier.”

“My chandelier?” Gabriel questioned. “I believe that it is more of your chandelier than mine. And even that is beside the point. It is simply an object, one that we don’t even use. If you haven’t noticed, not a single Egnotis has stepped foot in this house for years, let alone lived in it… that is, of course, if you decide not to stay. However, if you do, I would like to emphasize the fact that the chandelier would indeed be your property, therefore there would be no need to apologize, which, according to your tone, sounded as though you were about to.”

“I was.”

“I know.”

My Bad.

2009-05-21T16:48:00.001-07:00

So apparently my comment link hasn't been working since I purged this blog and started over. I fixed it today. Happy blogging!

Update #1- FedEx is being stupid and hasn't updated the tracker on my manuscript since the 19th

Update #2- Most of my stuff moved back up the hill! Only my mattress and a few more boxes

Update #3- Absolutewrite.com forum novel exercise: Create your own soundtrack. Here's mine for The Illuminated:

01. Invasion – Eisley
02. Downfall of Us All – A Day to Remember
03. The Archer’s Bows Are Broken – Brand New
04. Tiffany Blews – Fall Out Boy
05. Stare at the Sun – Thrice
06. Choose the One Who Loves You More - Copeland
07. XOXOXO – Secret and Whisper
08. Sweet and Low – Augustana
09. Love Like Winter – A.F.I.
10. Dark Blue – Jack’s Mannequin
11. The Bird and the Worm – The Used
12. Krwlng – Linkin Park
13. A Moment Suspended in Time - Underoath
14. Combust and Feel Better – Yesterdays Rising
15. Start the Machine - Angels and Airwaves

People I Can't Stop Watching

2009-05-14T15:35:00.000-07:00

I have this certain actor obsession. Some capture characters so well or give off facial/body expressions in such a way that it leaves me entranced, and sometimes gives me motivation for certain character qualities in everything that I write or create. Some of the actors are huge and some have only been in small roles, but for many reasons I just can't stop watching them. They are just too intriguing. So here's my list:

Zachary Quinto
In my opinion one of the most talented actors in the biz right now. Please, do me a favor and watch Heroes followed by Star Trek and tell me that you're not amazed. Just try.

Zachary Levi
Everyone's favorite Nerd Herder! Who doesn't love him? No but really, Zachary is simply soaked in charm.

Elizabeth Mitchell
Phenomenal actress. I'm surprised she's still doing just TV.

Nathan Fillion
Adorably funny, and deserves so much more than straight-to-DVD sequels and cancelled television shows (all of which are epically fantastic, might I add)

Molly Quinn
Speaking of Castle, Molly Quinn is so freaking cute that I can hardly stand it. She'll be in the remake of A Christmas Carol this December.

Kenneth Branagh
Anyone who can make Shakespeare that interesting by fantastic performances is a hero in my book.

Giovanni Ribisi
There is something strange going on here. I seem to love him for some mysterious reason that I haven't been able to pinpoint.

Paul Rudd
Oh so obvious reasons. :-)
Thomas Dekker
Whether he's John Connor or the nerd from Heroes, there is something incredibly serene about his performance... nearly hypnotic.

Emily Browning
I'm pretty sure this is the only posted actor who is up here for their face. Just look at her. She's like a doll.
No but really. She's a good actress too. But her face...

Amanda Bynes
Being one of the few young, funny women on the big screen, I have to say that she's my hero. Keep making those movies, Amanda!
Zac Efron
Oh yes, the infamous Zac Efron. He can sing, he can act, he can dance... no wonder the tweens love him. I believe however, under all of those layers, is a great actor. So come on Zac! Let's see a serious role!

Ryan Reynolds
I do prefer him in the roles where he keeps his shirt ON, but man, some of his performances are outstanding. And yes, I'm talking post-Van Wilder.

Shia Labeouf
Why? Because action flicks are awesome, and Shia does them well. That's why.